HAHAH. TODAY'S HUAT DAY!
and my moment of epiphany today??!!
i guessed i only realised it..
but abit late.. hahahaha... argh.
dun matter.. im sealing everything up with cement.
=D anyway.. grats dear!!!!!
wish u bliss anyway..
i haven got the chance to watch a movie alone...
1) superheroes movie 2) definitely maybe 3) ???
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
SUPERHERO MOVIE
YAY! its FINALLY OUT!!!!
gotta watch it.. its damn hilarious! hahah
and today is such a crisis day for me n theresa. hah
yeah. i guess im left with 3 choices now.
i'll take the last 2 i guess..
and i better stop the inferiority complex thing.. ><
yeahh.. i rock! and i love myself! hah
ohhh.. im damnnn tired... ><
today's a really hot day!
and my ulcers are really killing me!!!!
hurts like crap..
cant talk...
okie. gotta go do work soon.
and yay! i got DBSK's stuffs from moo!!
thanks! hah
gotta watch it.. its damn hilarious! hahah
and today is such a crisis day for me n theresa. hah
yeah. i guess im left with 3 choices now.
i'll take the last 2 i guess..
and i better stop the inferiority complex thing.. ><
yeahh.. i rock! and i love myself! hah
ohhh.. im damnnn tired... ><
today's a really hot day!
and my ulcers are really killing me!!!!
hurts like crap..
cant talk...
okie. gotta go do work soon.
and yay! i got DBSK's stuffs from moo!!
thanks! hah
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
memory?
there was one thing that Ms kwok said that impacted me alot today..
about memory, about trying to forget a part of our lives, trying to forget the traumatic experiences some had in life...
i've been searching for her recently..
facebook. friendster, blogs.. wherever..
i don't know why i'm even bothering to find out..
to see how shes doing perhaps?? to see if she's changed??
to see if shes getting on "well".... i know we were young, and naive...
but i cant help but wish that something would happen to her..
that something small.... just for vengence perhaps???
maybe something small to show her how it feels to be in my shoes..
a little revenge i wanna take..
nt too severe, afterall we were so young...
harmless as the young may look.. but the years of my growth (psychologically? ) were taunted,
and scarred.
no matter how much i tried to forgot...
the terror still flashes back now and then.....
evrey little trigger... can just pull me back to the past,
where everything was dark and haunting....
where i had no where to escape...
about memory, about trying to forget a part of our lives, trying to forget the traumatic experiences some had in life...
i've been searching for her recently..
facebook. friendster, blogs.. wherever..
i don't know why i'm even bothering to find out..
to see how shes doing perhaps?? to see if she's changed??
to see if shes getting on "well".... i know we were young, and naive...
but i cant help but wish that something would happen to her..
that something small.... just for vengence perhaps???
maybe something small to show her how it feels to be in my shoes..
a little revenge i wanna take..
nt too severe, afterall we were so young...
harmless as the young may look.. but the years of my growth (psychologically? ) were taunted,
and scarred.
no matter how much i tried to forgot...
the terror still flashes back now and then.....
evrey little trigger... can just pull me back to the past,
where everything was dark and haunting....
where i had no where to escape...
Monday, April 21, 2008
21APRIL08
today's concert day!!!!
=D nothing really bad happened
but it was really really short..
and i think our rehearsal was alot better..
coz of the crowd perhaps??
im really tired now...
legs, hands, feet, brain, eyes, everywhere.....
and i've still got math to do
well at least i've got no more choir...
can just mug and mug and mug..
aint tt bad i guess?! =D
JIAYOU people!!!!!
and omg... we're having a really cool history sem. =DDD
i feel ashamed to even like you.
afraid that you will find it digusted that someone like me actually liked you..
but everytime i wanna resist the temptations of talking to you,
i find it so hard that i give up...
so... sorry to you, whom i've liked. (:
=D nothing really bad happened
but it was really really short..
and i think our rehearsal was alot better..
coz of the crowd perhaps??
im really tired now...
legs, hands, feet, brain, eyes, everywhere.....
and i've still got math to do
well at least i've got no more choir...
can just mug and mug and mug..
aint tt bad i guess?! =D
JIAYOU people!!!!!
and omg... we're having a really cool history sem. =DDD
i feel ashamed to even like you.
afraid that you will find it digusted that someone like me actually liked you..
but everytime i wanna resist the temptations of talking to you,
i find it so hard that i give up...
so... sorry to you, whom i've liked. (:
Saturday, April 19, 2008
locked.
i dunno me.
i've never known me.
Like many other disorders, claustrophobia can sometimes develop due to a traumatic incident in childhood.
my mum was doing my brows just now...
i dunno how long she took..
but it seemed forever..
she pressed me down in my swivel chair...
i found it hard to breathe
and after a really long time... i started breathing really heavily
and something in me.. told me i had to break free...
i kept struggling to leave the chair but she shuned my pleas, thinking that i was just impatient
until i started tearing and she received a shock..
i got a shock myself too..
i thought it was only in enclose spaces that i'll feel that way..
but i think somehow.. someone pressing me down or trapping me.
will trigger the pain as well...
yest, they closed me in the toilet again...
for fun, i was really scared..
but i tried not to show it..
i knw showing fear would only bring more pleasure and satisfaction to those who locks me up..
i don't know why my fear can bring happiness,
and i don't understand the logic..
i knw they don't mean it.
but if they really left the door and lock me in..
i will go mad.
i think thats why i need to build up my strength..
thats why i'm walking so fast,
to show that i'm not weak.
thats why i like to carry heavy things,
to show that i'm not weak.
well, but at least i have friends now..
just that i still feel locked behind the doors.
and the real me, that i've so well hidden.
that me myself, have forgotten where it is,
and how it looks like.
its and it now, because i'm not sure what form it takes.
or even, if it takes up any.
so i'll wait. for the day, where the keysmith come,
and free me from the locked door,
and i'll own that pair of keys myself,
to do be able to open it myself.
but right now, i am still locked.
walls had immediate impact on me,
i wonder how it would be,
if i didn't leave that place..
would i be like them?
if were them,
would i have alrdy grown immuned towards the pain?
where walls are too high...
and the door is locked.
and when i feel so small...
so small...
yet unable to squeeze through the empty spaces of the door...
i've never known me.
Like many other disorders, claustrophobia can sometimes develop due to a traumatic incident in childhood.
my mum was doing my brows just now...
i dunno how long she took..
but it seemed forever..
she pressed me down in my swivel chair...
i found it hard to breathe
and after a really long time... i started breathing really heavily
and something in me.. told me i had to break free...
i kept struggling to leave the chair but she shuned my pleas, thinking that i was just impatient
until i started tearing and she received a shock..
i got a shock myself too..
i thought it was only in enclose spaces that i'll feel that way..
but i think somehow.. someone pressing me down or trapping me.
will trigger the pain as well...
yest, they closed me in the toilet again...
for fun, i was really scared..
but i tried not to show it..
i knw showing fear would only bring more pleasure and satisfaction to those who locks me up..
i don't know why my fear can bring happiness,
and i don't understand the logic..
i knw they don't mean it.
but if they really left the door and lock me in..
i will go mad.
i think thats why i need to build up my strength..
thats why i'm walking so fast,
to show that i'm not weak.
thats why i like to carry heavy things,
to show that i'm not weak.
well, but at least i have friends now..
just that i still feel locked behind the doors.
and the real me, that i've so well hidden.
that me myself, have forgotten where it is,
and how it looks like.
its and it now, because i'm not sure what form it takes.
or even, if it takes up any.
so i'll wait. for the day, where the keysmith come,
and free me from the locked door,
and i'll own that pair of keys myself,
to do be able to open it myself.
but right now, i am still locked.
walls had immediate impact on me,
i wonder how it would be,
if i didn't leave that place..
would i be like them?
if were them,
would i have alrdy grown immuned towards the pain?
where walls are too high...
and the door is locked.
and when i feel so small...
so small...
yet unable to squeeze through the empty spaces of the door...
Friday, April 18, 2008
MUSIC.FOODFORLIFE.
my eyes are gradually shutting.
very very very very tired..
slept throughout my whole bus ride.. .and i think my bag was too big..
the poor uncle had part of my bag on his lap. woops =X
neway... thank god econs is not due this coming monday..
finally.. i can relax for a sunday... but still... minimal work. nt none. heh
wanna catch definitely, maybe. or horton?!
think i'll just go watch whtever there is after studies..
im zonked out again.
today's full dress was rather fulfilling..
sounded nice...
looked quite nice..
not as bad as expected la. hahah.
and OMG.. i'm sooo in love with yin xue!!!!!
gosh.... anyone wld marry her la. HAH
and yay. i feel taller. =D the pain is all worth it.
ok la.. actually i think its not how high the heel is that caused the pain.
but more of the toes... i've gt a huge blister.
but anyway.. had a great time singing. =D yay
drama night's first night today as well...
hope they did well. hee =D
will be catching it tmr.. i dunno how..
coz my whole day is super jammed packed.
sighh.. i'll sort out a way..
college day tmr...
surprise! school song. hah =.=
okie... im officially closing my eyes..
night people!! =D
take care of ur voices pple. <3
very very very very tired..
slept throughout my whole bus ride.. .and i think my bag was too big..
the poor uncle had part of my bag on his lap. woops =X
neway... thank god econs is not due this coming monday..
finally.. i can relax for a sunday... but still... minimal work. nt none. heh
wanna catch definitely, maybe. or horton?!
think i'll just go watch whtever there is after studies..
im zonked out again.
today's full dress was rather fulfilling..
sounded nice...
looked quite nice..
not as bad as expected la. hahah.
and OMG.. i'm sooo in love with yin xue!!!!!
gosh.... anyone wld marry her la. HAH
and yay. i feel taller. =D the pain is all worth it.
ok la.. actually i think its not how high the heel is that caused the pain.
but more of the toes... i've gt a huge blister.
but anyway.. had a great time singing. =D yay
drama night's first night today as well...
hope they did well. hee =D
will be catching it tmr.. i dunno how..
coz my whole day is super jammed packed.
sighh.. i'll sort out a way..
college day tmr...
surprise! school song. hah =.=
okie... im officially closing my eyes..
night people!! =D
take care of ur voices pple. <3
Thursday, April 17, 2008
butterflies.
whats with butterflies recently..
firstly they raid my tummy..
and now they haunt me physically..
the journey from sch to the mrt station was so embarrasing..
butterflies jumping out of no where...
and this man got a shock and frantically looking at the grass patch..
thinking i saw something very grotesque or something...
(it is btw. fluttery things)
i've been feeling fluttery and i dunno why.
okay maybe i do. =/
maybe im just trying to convince myself that is not..
but escapism sometimes don't solve everything??
god has pranked me enough..
enough of heartaches?
is he going to return me all the bliss that he hid away from me for so long?
or had he forgotten to add it in to my life?
haha. talking to wifey just now made me recap all of it again.. ><
and my tummy is churning.. >< hungry i suppose..
my appetite grew smaller... cant finish food now..
counting down the days to drama nite, to concert, and to stepping down...
im gonna mug hard every single day aft concert.
i'll make sure the missing of england trip will be worth it.
it gives us motivation either way...
demoralizing but drives me on..
to show that i'm not dumb...
and that i've fully utilized the week they spent there.
im gonna work extra hard for the fun they have over there...
yes... and i will fly to places after my As proudly...
yupp. lyn sis, if u're reading this.. i may wanna fly over for a few weeks..
=D but u gotta teach me jap tt is.. heh.
okie.. my room is in a mess... ><
gotta continue packing.. =DD
and my tummy's growling...
roarrrr!!!
bye!
firstly they raid my tummy..
and now they haunt me physically..
the journey from sch to the mrt station was so embarrasing..
butterflies jumping out of no where...
and this man got a shock and frantically looking at the grass patch..
thinking i saw something very grotesque or something...
(it is btw. fluttery things)
i've been feeling fluttery and i dunno why.
okay maybe i do. =/
maybe im just trying to convince myself that is not..
but escapism sometimes don't solve everything??
god has pranked me enough..
enough of heartaches?
is he going to return me all the bliss that he hid away from me for so long?
or had he forgotten to add it in to my life?
haha. talking to wifey just now made me recap all of it again.. ><
and my tummy is churning.. >< hungry i suppose..
my appetite grew smaller... cant finish food now..
counting down the days to drama nite, to concert, and to stepping down...
im gonna mug hard every single day aft concert.
i'll make sure the missing of england trip will be worth it.
it gives us motivation either way...
demoralizing but drives me on..
to show that i'm not dumb...
and that i've fully utilized the week they spent there.
im gonna work extra hard for the fun they have over there...
yes... and i will fly to places after my As proudly...
yupp. lyn sis, if u're reading this.. i may wanna fly over for a few weeks..
=D but u gotta teach me jap tt is.. heh.
okie.. my room is in a mess... ><
gotta continue packing.. =DD
and my tummy's growling...
roarrrr!!!
bye!
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
zonked
like wht the heading suggest. yes. im totally zonked out.
today was a jammed packed day...
few more days toconcert..
and i realise i forgot to learn festival gloria!!
omg.. i was just free styling just now...
tmr first period econs,
im so dead.
im alrdy dead..
and dying again early in the morning tmr.
yawns... im really really tired..
ok.. appealing to all people!!
pls come for the nyjc choir concert!!!!!!!
pls do support.. =D
tiring but at least not a bad day..
even tho toh kinda spoiled it...
yawns...
-.-ZzzzZZZZzzz
im really transforming into a panda soon..
huge eyebags n dark eye rings.
*why is everything coming to me all of a sudden?? moment of "epiphany" today??? nt really.. it dint lead to anything positive.. just another event in my life.. >< if you dun understand this part.. i can totally knw hw u feel. coz i dun even knw wht im typing. BAHH.
k. BYE BASTARDS!!! off to debastardize for a moment.
today was a jammed packed day...
few more days toconcert..
and i realise i forgot to learn festival gloria!!
omg.. i was just free styling just now...
tmr first period econs,
im so dead.
im alrdy dead..
and dying again early in the morning tmr.
yawns... im really really tired..
ok.. appealing to all people!!
pls come for the nyjc choir concert!!!!!!!
pls do support.. =D
tiring but at least not a bad day..
even tho toh kinda spoiled it...
yawns...
-.-ZzzzZZZZzzz
im really transforming into a panda soon..
huge eyebags n dark eye rings.
*why is everything coming to me all of a sudden?? moment of "epiphany" today??? nt really.. it dint lead to anything positive.. just another event in my life.. >< if you dun understand this part.. i can totally knw hw u feel. coz i dun even knw wht im typing. BAHH.
k. BYE BASTARDS!!! off to debastardize for a moment.
Monday, April 14, 2008
BAD DAY
hah, don't ask me why.
today's just bad.
feel zonked and carrying around a "souless soul" (familar eh?)
had "choir" today.. yes inverted commas, coz we dint do anything..
i was just pata pon-ing in the music room..
my eyes are sooo tired...
and im sooo tired..
and my nose is itching...
someones talking bad about me... ><
yawns... i still have heaps to do..
sighh.. bad day!!!!!
k. zonking off... BYE!
today's just bad.
feel zonked and carrying around a "souless soul" (familar eh?)
had "choir" today.. yes inverted commas, coz we dint do anything..
i was just pata pon-ing in the music room..
my eyes are sooo tired...
and im sooo tired..
and my nose is itching...
someones talking bad about me... ><
yawns... i still have heaps to do..
sighh.. bad day!!!!!
k. zonking off... BYE!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
stoney.
econs make me feel stoney.
dun feel like moving my hand at all..
and my paper's still as blank as ever..
hahah, just came back from a round of shopping for concert stuffs.
bought my pants. ( i like it =D ) hides all the fats. HAHAH
and the lady actually gave me and theresa the "aww so sweet , she has big bucks look"
lol! utterly wrong imagery. i think its just the height.. tsk!
saw the trailer for "superhero movie" hahahha.. i think its a must watch..
damn funny... LOL... and i think my tummy is growling... ><
i'm almost done with memorizing the scores... yayness
finished the glass menagerie
left with 4 econs essays.
yawns...
thinking of work makes me sleep..
aight... gotta go nua abit before i do work. lol
mood : mild.
song of the day: White Love Story - As One =D
line of the day: AHhhhhhhh, i wanna quit school
dun feel like moving my hand at all..
and my paper's still as blank as ever..
hahah, just came back from a round of shopping for concert stuffs.
bought my pants. ( i like it =D ) hides all the fats. HAHAH
and the lady actually gave me and theresa the "aww so sweet , she has big bucks look"
lol! utterly wrong imagery. i think its just the height.. tsk!
saw the trailer for "superhero movie" hahahha.. i think its a must watch..
damn funny... LOL... and i think my tummy is growling... ><
i'm almost done with memorizing the scores... yayness
finished the glass menagerie
left with 4 econs essays.
yawns...
thinking of work makes me sleep..
aight... gotta go nua abit before i do work. lol
mood : mild.
song of the day: White Love Story - As One =D
line of the day: AHhhhhhhh, i wanna quit school
Saturday, April 12, 2008
choir...
choir day today...
super long day.......
was supposed to have sectionals at 1045, but ended up we started at 11 plus..
i went to school at 9 anyway. HAH.
did one paragraph of glass menagerie and tts about all..
hahaha. talked to my wife alot today.. =D
and im confused as ever. XD
and i've gotta go get my heels and my pants tmr! and finish up the essays.
busy busy busy...
and hes not helping at all la!
intimidating and screamings may work...
but it suck!!!! pressured by fear...
and fear driven progress is quite torturing..
but we did improve.. alot rather..
and i had a hard time being gu-niang...
HAHAH! shld try to be more gentle from now...
21st century sports woman! hahaha.. just now was so paiseh.. i called "auntie, UNCLE" LOL!
so embarrassing!! lol....
okie.. gotta go chiong essays!
see ya peeps. =D
get tickets from me pls!! =DD loves loves..
super long day.......
was supposed to have sectionals at 1045, but ended up we started at 11 plus..
i went to school at 9 anyway. HAH.
did one paragraph of glass menagerie and tts about all..
hahaha. talked to my wife alot today.. =D
and im confused as ever. XD
and i've gotta go get my heels and my pants tmr! and finish up the essays.
busy busy busy...
and hes not helping at all la!
intimidating and screamings may work...
but it suck!!!! pressured by fear...
and fear driven progress is quite torturing..
but we did improve.. alot rather..
and i had a hard time being gu-niang...
HAHAH! shld try to be more gentle from now...
21st century sports woman! hahaha.. just now was so paiseh.. i called "auntie, UNCLE" LOL!
so embarrassing!! lol....
okie.. gotta go chiong essays!
see ya peeps. =D
get tickets from me pls!! =DD loves loves..
Friday, April 11, 2008
NYGT! SYNERGY
omg.. so many talented pple ard..
first and foremost.. grats to lester and tedson!!! and the rest of the CO pple..
i think half of the population can sing la! hahaha...
i dun care.. im gonna go learn from the experts... =P
i felt dumb just now..
whts my talent?!
good for nothing.. >< again.
i think ive been on this issue for a pretty long time...
the i-am-nothing issue.
nothingness... i think i'll do better in Lear than Othello. LOL
omg... the blindfolded pianists were damn good!!!!!!! RJ and Phu trinh ? cant spoil ur name!! hahaa. sorry!!! =D hidden talent!!! shld have just played Glory Of Love for us..
the magic show was damn cool... he reminds me of cleby i dunnno why. LOL
and... and.... the stanley guy?! omg.. his voice is damn good!!!!!
and so are the rest of the singers...
nat totally melted me just now!! the 2nd song.. on the brink of tears...
Lesty has fans alrdy! hahaha... but they are really WOW-ers up there la...
sighh... i cant do anything!!!!!! ok maybe just sing.. like WOW.... singing is no big D... ><
PW results is back... its a C... ok la... given that my presentation was really really screwed up...
so nothing much to complain about...
im really tired... have like 6 essays to do.... and theres a long day of choir tmr.. gonna miss 2 weeks of tuition for choir... arghhh... and just had some argument with my mum...
sighhh...
all sorts of emotions gushing over...
and im still guessing..
its a cycle..
and i think i will give up soon...
first and foremost.. grats to lester and tedson!!! and the rest of the CO pple..
i think half of the population can sing la! hahaha...
i dun care.. im gonna go learn from the experts... =P
i felt dumb just now..
whts my talent?!
good for nothing.. >< again.
i think ive been on this issue for a pretty long time...
the i-am-nothing issue.
nothingness... i think i'll do better in Lear than Othello. LOL
omg... the blindfolded pianists were damn good!!!!!!! RJ and Phu trinh ? cant spoil ur name!! hahaa. sorry!!! =D hidden talent!!! shld have just played Glory Of Love for us..
the magic show was damn cool... he reminds me of cleby i dunnno why. LOL
and... and.... the stanley guy?! omg.. his voice is damn good!!!!!
and so are the rest of the singers...
nat totally melted me just now!! the 2nd song.. on the brink of tears...
Lesty has fans alrdy! hahaha... but they are really WOW-ers up there la...
sighh... i cant do anything!!!!!! ok maybe just sing.. like WOW.... singing is no big D... ><
PW results is back... its a C... ok la... given that my presentation was really really screwed up...
so nothing much to complain about...
im really tired... have like 6 essays to do.... and theres a long day of choir tmr.. gonna miss 2 weeks of tuition for choir... arghhh... and just had some argument with my mum...
sighhh...
all sorts of emotions gushing over...
and im still guessing..
its a cycle..
and i think i will give up soon...
Thursday, April 10, 2008
BYE BYE
say byebye to England. yup. officially. thanks to the 3 of U!!!!!!
seriously, i felt sad la.. being left behind and all
say byebye to the friends who are going. yes.. all my best buds are going.
thanks again to the 3 of U!
say byebye to the cheap condo that ive rented out for so long.. to so many pple..
its time to tear those old walls down, build another new house.
with more stable walls for the private landed property.
yes.. it will be on sale at high price, a free hold apartment,
where one stays on, forever..
yes, say byebye to the past.
i feel like saying bye bye to the current tenant,
but each time he says he wanna move out, the desire to stay holds him back again.
i guess i'll have to wait. for the conformation slip to come.
before i can really say byebye.
seriously, i felt sad la.. being left behind and all
say byebye to the friends who are going. yes.. all my best buds are going.
thanks again to the 3 of U!
say byebye to the cheap condo that ive rented out for so long.. to so many pple..
its time to tear those old walls down, build another new house.
with more stable walls for the private landed property.
yes.. it will be on sale at high price, a free hold apartment,
where one stays on, forever..
yes, say byebye to the past.
i feel like saying bye bye to the current tenant,
but each time he says he wanna move out, the desire to stay holds him back again.
i guess i'll have to wait. for the conformation slip to come.
before i can really say byebye.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
fragile heart.
my heart's fragile, handle with care. if not, dun touch it at all. thanks.
its just been pieced back, i dun wanna smash it against the wall again.. too much pain to take, to much for the young heart that has yet felt loved, and yet feel the thorns pierce through each time. too much of guessing, too much of wrong decisions and too much of thoughts. yes. i shld just find a corner and hide away forever... good for nothing piece of ****. well.. i have improvements... but GP still sucked like no ones business..and econs.. dun even talk about it...
okayy.. shld focus on something else... had choir just now... Ms Seah was sooooo cute la!! OMG... AHAHAHA... i will so love her if im a guy... on this issue about being a guy. LOL... i think its amusing.... hahha. (yup, we will make a damn good couple if its possible ) HAH. but of coz.. nature forbids us to be.. well.... we are BFF. ok, i realise this post is rather incoherrent. shld end right now...
*my gosh, is tt even jealousy? *
its just been pieced back, i dun wanna smash it against the wall again.. too much pain to take, to much for the young heart that has yet felt loved, and yet feel the thorns pierce through each time. too much of guessing, too much of wrong decisions and too much of thoughts. yes. i shld just find a corner and hide away forever... good for nothing piece of ****. well.. i have improvements... but GP still sucked like no ones business..and econs.. dun even talk about it...
okayy.. shld focus on something else... had choir just now... Ms Seah was sooooo cute la!! OMG... AHAHAHA... i will so love her if im a guy... on this issue about being a guy. LOL... i think its amusing.... hahha. (yup, we will make a damn good couple if its possible ) HAH. but of coz.. nature forbids us to be.. well.... we are BFF. ok, i realise this post is rather incoherrent. shld end right now...
*my gosh, is tt even jealousy? *
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
all year's fool
yawnss... im super tired.. just finished watching ten brothers. damn sad. but they died with smiling. so not that bad.... anyway... today was supposed to be half day thing..but we ended sch with lit lecture at 130... and! there was supposed to be econs lecture at the same time..
so.... there was lit and econs going on at the same time.. we went for the lit one obviously.. dint knw econs was tt timing...
ok, i shld blog about this silly prank they played on me.... and it was seemingly real....
the 3 girls... FAITH , ANGELA and THERESA (FAT : mean pple ) hid my phone... initially A n T said they flushed my phone down the toilet,.. like wow. hahah, im not a 3 year old can.. and.... later on... they said they hid it in ms poh's pigeon hole... and it really felt damn real... coz they really sound convinced that it was there... and i went up and down the corridor... looking for my phone...and it was totally not in sight!!!! i was so panicky.. and mr w. yeo was just at the door.. he must think im insane...opening and peeping into all the pigeon hole and the recycle bin... and after that... faith said tt it cld be ms poh that has taken my phone away.. coz she went to the toilet... high chance she cld have checked the PH and took it in... so faith suggested that i msg her... and she really did sound convincing!!!!! den i went to the staffroom... pacing outside.. thinking whether to press the intercom... and i decided to wait for her to come out... and when faith wanted to drag me downstairs to find panadol... guess wht?! ms poh came out!!! i just went to her.. and started laughing in frt of her.... i think she felt shocked and amused. haaha.. from her expression.... then, F n T just ran away.. and frantically signalling me back... so i just ran back ... laughing non stop still.... and she just went back confused, i think. wht a nice prank la!!! made me run up and down and doin stupid things running around.... and i had to msg ms poh to apologize... hahhaa... too late to apologize... but she was really cool about it.. damn, have her class tmr.. woops. hahaha..
oh oh!! and rewinding back to 9am. i had PE... and.. not wanting to waste the 5 stations results... i took my 2.4... tt teacher was just being mean yest. sulks. but i walked like most of it.. and i had a not very good timing... 1640. there goes my gold.. >< but well... thank god... i passed... and for the 4th consecutive year... i ran with my period..how unlucky.. but its always this kinda timing.. so yeahh... im not going into the army anyway.. hahah!
one more thing!!!! hahaha, me and my wife were just talking about our relationship.. seriously.. its amazing.. ok. sounds wrong.. friendship i meant.... yeahh, its a wonder how close i can be with a person..... =DD love you soooooooooo much!!! haaha.. yeah. and all my other wonderful wonderful bullies and friends.. LOL.. yay. love u all! =D
*you treaded into my heart, you took away nothing.. but left the gentle footprints behind... are you wiping it off?? or will time erase it away?? but at the moment, the prints blend into mine... not now, i wouldnt wanna take away the beauty... lemme just enjoy the present... im contented this way*
=D bye peeps!!
so.... there was lit and econs going on at the same time.. we went for the lit one obviously.. dint knw econs was tt timing...
ok, i shld blog about this silly prank they played on me.... and it was seemingly real....
the 3 girls... FAITH , ANGELA and THERESA (FAT : mean pple ) hid my phone... initially A n T said they flushed my phone down the toilet,.. like wow. hahah, im not a 3 year old can.. and.... later on... they said they hid it in ms poh's pigeon hole... and it really felt damn real... coz they really sound convinced that it was there... and i went up and down the corridor... looking for my phone...and it was totally not in sight!!!! i was so panicky.. and mr w. yeo was just at the door.. he must think im insane...opening and peeping into all the pigeon hole and the recycle bin... and after that... faith said tt it cld be ms poh that has taken my phone away.. coz she went to the toilet... high chance she cld have checked the PH and took it in... so faith suggested that i msg her... and she really did sound convincing!!!!! den i went to the staffroom... pacing outside.. thinking whether to press the intercom... and i decided to wait for her to come out... and when faith wanted to drag me downstairs to find panadol... guess wht?! ms poh came out!!! i just went to her.. and started laughing in frt of her.... i think she felt shocked and amused. haaha.. from her expression.... then, F n T just ran away.. and frantically signalling me back... so i just ran back ... laughing non stop still.... and she just went back confused, i think. wht a nice prank la!!! made me run up and down and doin stupid things running around.... and i had to msg ms poh to apologize... hahhaa... too late to apologize... but she was really cool about it.. damn, have her class tmr.. woops. hahaha..
oh oh!! and rewinding back to 9am. i had PE... and.. not wanting to waste the 5 stations results... i took my 2.4... tt teacher was just being mean yest. sulks. but i walked like most of it.. and i had a not very good timing... 1640. there goes my gold.. >< but well... thank god... i passed... and for the 4th consecutive year... i ran with my period..how unlucky.. but its always this kinda timing.. so yeahh... im not going into the army anyway.. hahah!
one more thing!!!! hahaha, me and my wife were just talking about our relationship.. seriously.. its amazing.. ok. sounds wrong.. friendship i meant.... yeahh, its a wonder how close i can be with a person..... =DD love you soooooooooo much!!! haaha.. yeah. and all my other wonderful wonderful bullies and friends.. LOL.. yay. love u all! =D
*you treaded into my heart, you took away nothing.. but left the gentle footprints behind... are you wiping it off?? or will time erase it away?? but at the moment, the prints blend into mine... not now, i wouldnt wanna take away the beauty... lemme just enjoy the present... im contented this way*
=D bye peeps!!
Monday, April 7, 2008
saranghae.
DBSK madness!! omg.. love xiah and mickey. mickey has tattoos... but hes sexy. so hes forgiven. hah. Xiah's still my type. =DD bring me to korea!!!
aherm, Theresa Tan and Angela Siow stop bullying me!! damn you pple. haha. im nt to be trifled with. theresa, u knw why.. HAHAHAA...
choir concert's coming up.. haven sold a single ticket yet.. sighhss...
sorry choir.. leen's not popular.. she dun sell books and stationery.. and cant sell tickets.
LOL. sorry. tt was utter crap, i knw. dun roll ur eyes.. they may never wanna come down again...
and yay!! i got 67 for history =D a friggin B! After like ages.. i broke free of the U grade curse!! hahahaa.. yay!!! but i still have 3 Us tho.. namely GP, Econs and Math.. not surprising yeh?! haha. its eileen.. failing's her forte..... totally.
and i've decided to like myself more... if not i will just continue sinking into my little pit and see darkness forever... NOOOOO.. and all i hear are muffled echoes and the silent screams that vibrates so violently in the pits of my heart. ok.. whts with me and pits?!! okie.. i'll go for RUTS next time... the grand canyon?! lol... i realised i really veer off tangent when i talk... or write.. which is why im always doing so badly for lit n gp. eileen justs drifts off to her lala land. Thou shalt not drift... im not jay chou and neither is the title of my life initial D or initial E. hahaha...
ok, i'm self proclaiming insane... right... gotta go do math... left sch early today.. finshed econs finally... and squatting down by the road side and flagging the cab aint glam at all.. o well, eileen's never glam. not her word.
finished dou niu today.. OMGAWD LA... how can someone propose with an empty box and look so suave kneeling down lidat?!! hahaha... hes not tw's hottest guy for nth... and hebe is totally HOT. hah. but Xiah still beats everyone... i still like changmin's pup!! a maltese or smthing.. just looks CUTE! ahahahaha.... i want a pup too... oh. and i still owe kenny a hamster.. i drew a super ugly purple one for him... HAHAHA... totally ugly even tho its purple. i cant draw for heavens sake!!! hahaha.
aight... gotta zhao... =D byebye!!!!
* miss you =D *
yes, you, whoever's reading this...
HAHA.. pukes*SPATS*
OH OH..last thing.... pls get my tickets.. =D i'll love you alot alot alot alot.. HAHAH!!
aherm, Theresa Tan and Angela Siow stop bullying me!! damn you pple. haha. im nt to be trifled with. theresa, u knw why.. HAHAHAA...
choir concert's coming up.. haven sold a single ticket yet.. sighhss...
sorry choir.. leen's not popular.. she dun sell books and stationery.. and cant sell tickets.
LOL. sorry. tt was utter crap, i knw. dun roll ur eyes.. they may never wanna come down again...
and yay!! i got 67 for history =D a friggin B! After like ages.. i broke free of the U grade curse!! hahahaa.. yay!!! but i still have 3 Us tho.. namely GP, Econs and Math.. not surprising yeh?! haha. its eileen.. failing's her forte..... totally.
and i've decided to like myself more... if not i will just continue sinking into my little pit and see darkness forever... NOOOOO.. and all i hear are muffled echoes and the silent screams that vibrates so violently in the pits of my heart. ok.. whts with me and pits?!! okie.. i'll go for RUTS next time... the grand canyon?! lol... i realised i really veer off tangent when i talk... or write.. which is why im always doing so badly for lit n gp. eileen justs drifts off to her lala land. Thou shalt not drift... im not jay chou and neither is the title of my life initial D or initial E. hahaha...
ok, i'm self proclaiming insane... right... gotta go do math... left sch early today.. finshed econs finally... and squatting down by the road side and flagging the cab aint glam at all.. o well, eileen's never glam. not her word.
finished dou niu today.. OMGAWD LA... how can someone propose with an empty box and look so suave kneeling down lidat?!! hahaha... hes not tw's hottest guy for nth... and hebe is totally HOT. hah. but Xiah still beats everyone... i still like changmin's pup!! a maltese or smthing.. just looks CUTE! ahahahaha.... i want a pup too... oh. and i still owe kenny a hamster.. i drew a super ugly purple one for him... HAHAHA... totally ugly even tho its purple. i cant draw for heavens sake!!! hahaha.
aight... gotta zhao... =D byebye!!!!
* miss you =D *
yes, you, whoever's reading this...
HAHA.. pukes*SPATS*
OH OH..last thing.... pls get my tickets.. =D i'll love you alot alot alot alot.. HAHAH!!
Sunday, April 6, 2008
OH NO.
AHHHHH.... screams!!!!! this shldnt be happening to me... sighhhs.. my heart's meeting her demise again.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
i wanna scream, someone bring me to the beach.
going to cp to mug tmr. muscles totally ache.
not from today's 5 stations but more of yesterday's running and jumping...
and 2.4 on monday. like wht?!?! with my muscles and my cramping abdomen.. .aoowww.. im not gonna run man... but did well for the 5 stations tho, broke many of my own records... standing broad jump and shuttle run was amazing... 186!! i can jump over the guys of 183 club and they will go unscathed. cool huh. hahaha. anyway, the fact that i jumped over my own height isnt amazing. coz everyone shld jump over my height. hahaha. shuttle run was nice too.. i will usually retard during turns but this time was so much better... 10.77.. ok la..for a non-sports cca person. its considered commendable. and i got A for sit and reach as well.. for a woodblock, its amazing too. hahaha. yay. but 2.4 will spoil it again... GAHHHH... i cant run long distance... and i realise that my periods always come when i have to run 2.4... for 4 years consecutively. wow. hahaha.. why cant they let me run at ease?!!
but i really still feel like screaming and going crazy... bring me to somewhere secluded so that doing crazy stuffs will not seem too crazy... yawns. aight. gonna do econs...
have fun pple... in whtever u are doing..
and rmb!! absomusiclutely!!! =DD
going to cp to mug tmr. muscles totally ache.
not from today's 5 stations but more of yesterday's running and jumping...
and 2.4 on monday. like wht?!?! with my muscles and my cramping abdomen.. .aoowww.. im not gonna run man... but did well for the 5 stations tho, broke many of my own records... standing broad jump and shuttle run was amazing... 186!! i can jump over the guys of 183 club and they will go unscathed. cool huh. hahaha. anyway, the fact that i jumped over my own height isnt amazing. coz everyone shld jump over my height. hahaha. shuttle run was nice too.. i will usually retard during turns but this time was so much better... 10.77.. ok la..for a non-sports cca person. its considered commendable. and i got A for sit and reach as well.. for a woodblock, its amazing too. hahaha. yay. but 2.4 will spoil it again... GAHHHH... i cant run long distance... and i realise that my periods always come when i have to run 2.4... for 4 years consecutively. wow. hahaha.. why cant they let me run at ease?!!
but i really still feel like screaming and going crazy... bring me to somewhere secluded so that doing crazy stuffs will not seem too crazy... yawns. aight. gonna do econs...
have fun pple... in whtever u are doing..
and rmb!! absomusiclutely!!! =DD
AbsoMusicLutely
Hey all, ABSOMUSICLUTELY is proud to present you NYJC choir. pls do come down and support us and we will reward you with our hearts and souls. This night is not to be missed. contact me for further details. =D
Friday, April 4, 2008
angel in disguise
I woke up this morning feeling kind of blue
and I stumbled out of bed and
dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was a rose
and a note that said 'Somebody Loves You'
Oh~ But out on the street it starts to pour
and before I get soaking wet,
A total stranger runs to give me
the jacket off his back
I turn around to thank him
But he waves me with a smile
And I can hardly believe my eyes
He puts on a halo and starts to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
I met a good friend for lunch
and we had a delicious meal
But I forgot to bring my wallet
I felt like an imbecile
But she was sweet, she gave me a treat and
Bought me a chicken sandwich
To take home for tea
Oh~ But out on the street with nothing to eat
A man and his shopping cart go
Travelling to places
Collecting social graces
I give him my sandwich
and we chatter for a while
I see a rainbow wash over his eyes
He gives me his halo and
I start to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Don't try to hide away from me
I know you're by my side
Oooh~~
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look at Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise
I woke up this morning
Feeling kind of new
and I stumbled out of bed and
dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was a rose
and a note that said 'Somebody Loves You'
Oh~ But out on the street it starts to pour
and before I get soaking wet,
A total stranger runs to give me
the jacket off his back
I turn around to thank him
But he waves me with a smile
And I can hardly believe my eyes
He puts on a halo and starts to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
I met a good friend for lunch
and we had a delicious meal
But I forgot to bring my wallet
I felt like an imbecile
But she was sweet, she gave me a treat and
Bought me a chicken sandwich
To take home for tea
Oh~ But out on the street with nothing to eat
A man and his shopping cart go
Travelling to places
Collecting social graces
I give him my sandwich
and we chatter for a while
I see a rainbow wash over his eyes
He gives me his halo and
I start to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Don't try to hide away from me
I know you're by my side
Oooh~~
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look at Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise
I woke up this morning
Feeling kind of new
Thursday, April 3, 2008
TAGGED
This quiz is dedicated to XINYING (yes, you! hah)
here goes...
Q1) 7 things/people that make u smile
Ans: my family; my friends; PURPLE?! ; cute stuffs ; the blue blue sky.. ; the As i will get in A Levels?! ahaha. [ I'LL GET IT! ] hahah, ; kids/babies?! sorry, im not a paedo. but they just make me smile =D
Q2) 7 things to do to win my heart
Ans: be ultra nice, share intimate things for 30 mins and stare deeply into my eyes for 4 mins. HAHAH. taken from GP, science of love. anyway, i just turned into a bull and shitted. sorry. HAH, anyway, the most impt things is to love me alot. tts all. =D
Q3) 7 things i believe inAns: everything.
Q4)7 things i am afraid ofAns:
hmmm? faith will wanna say everything. BUT, 7 greatest frights : dark, butterfly, eerie stuffs ( knw wht im talking abt.. ) , heights? , strange things!? , dogs or shld i say things tt move ard my legs... freaky aint it? , and most importantly the feeling of abandonment. well, im castrophobic. pple knws why. hah. =(
Q5) 7 things i do everydayAns: well, wht shld i say?! the mundane!? well.. wake, eat, bathe, sleep, study, sing, music? HAH. yey, music's in my life. =D
Q6) 7 things i want to see right nw
Ans: a fairy godmother that tells me, i will turn u pretty, rich, healthy, intelligent and everything u wanna be! ahahaha.. next, i wanna see a calendar that notes public holiday for the rest of the year, or years. then, i wanna see.... hmmm.. my history paper!... seriously.. why wun he give it back?! keeping us in suspense. anddd... i'll wanna see beautiful beautiful things?! libra has a thing for beauty. which is why i dislike the mirror.. >.< ... i wanna see everything else in frt of me, coz i cant imagine myself not able to see anything ( i just acted like the blind in lit class today, that short moment irritated me... feels so frustrating to feel the way toeverything.. )
Q7) 7 people i want to do this quizAns: kelvin, jackson, kenny, lester, elaine, amanda, faith ( write it on a piece of paper and hand in to me. by this week, or i'll call your parents. hahah ) , who else reads my blog?! i duno!! hahaha
here goes...
Q1) 7 things/people that make u smile
Ans: my family; my friends; PURPLE?! ; cute stuffs ; the blue blue sky.. ; the As i will get in A Levels?! ahaha. [ I'LL GET IT! ] hahah, ; kids/babies?! sorry, im not a paedo. but they just make me smile =D
Q2) 7 things to do to win my heart
Ans: be ultra nice, share intimate things for 30 mins and stare deeply into my eyes for 4 mins. HAHAH. taken from GP, science of love. anyway, i just turned into a bull and shitted. sorry. HAH, anyway, the most impt things is to love me alot. tts all. =D
Q3) 7 things i believe inAns: everything.
Q4)7 things i am afraid ofAns:
hmmm? faith will wanna say everything. BUT, 7 greatest frights : dark, butterfly, eerie stuffs ( knw wht im talking abt.. ) , heights? , strange things!? , dogs or shld i say things tt move ard my legs... freaky aint it? , and most importantly the feeling of abandonment. well, im castrophobic. pple knws why. hah. =(
Q5) 7 things i do everydayAns: well, wht shld i say?! the mundane!? well.. wake, eat, bathe, sleep, study, sing, music? HAH. yey, music's in my life. =D
Q6) 7 things i want to see right nw
Ans: a fairy godmother that tells me, i will turn u pretty, rich, healthy, intelligent and everything u wanna be! ahahaha.. next, i wanna see a calendar that notes public holiday for the rest of the year, or years. then, i wanna see.... hmmm.. my history paper!... seriously.. why wun he give it back?! keeping us in suspense. anddd... i'll wanna see beautiful beautiful things?! libra has a thing for beauty. which is why i dislike the mirror.. >.< ... i wanna see everything else in frt of me, coz i cant imagine myself not able to see anything ( i just acted like the blind in lit class today, that short moment irritated me... feels so frustrating to feel the way toeverything.. )
Q7) 7 people i want to do this quizAns: kelvin, jackson, kenny, lester, elaine, amanda, faith ( write it on a piece of paper and hand in to me. by this week, or i'll call your parents. hahah ) , who else reads my blog?! i duno!! hahaha
WARNING
here again, i announce, that i am FULLY, 100% TOTALLY, STRAIGHT!!
surprised that people actually still have doubts on it.
hahaha, prolly too close to my wifey..
BUT!! im totally into guys aight?!?!'
hahaha. and im also surprised that people actually read these blogs..
and i heard haters usually read it more than friends..wow.
i dun even visit blogs of friends that often.
okie... i dunno who hates me anyway.. haha.
Blocks was a total screw up. amazing math results. U3.. U for econs n gp as well.. sighh..
when do i stop veering off tangent when i write?!
i think i'll just do wht ms kwok suggested. write the question with big writing and put it in the pencil case. hah. alright people. take care... as well as the teachers from 0732. amusing and motivating talk pck gave. hah. we are all teachers, wow.
right... byebye! wun be here for some time, concert will just jam up our whole schedule...
OH OH!!! and YOU!! yes you, the one reading this very post. please please come for <> concert! u wun be disappointed, well, we will sing our best, so bring your ears!!
pls contact me for tickets. yes.. my hotline and my email's there.. just drop me a msg or smth. THANKS PPLE! <3
nights. (:
surprised that people actually still have doubts on it.
hahaha, prolly too close to my wifey..
BUT!! im totally into guys aight?!?!'
hahaha. and im also surprised that people actually read these blogs..
and i heard haters usually read it more than friends..wow.
i dun even visit blogs of friends that often.
okie... i dunno who hates me anyway.. haha.
Blocks was a total screw up. amazing math results. U3.. U for econs n gp as well.. sighh..
when do i stop veering off tangent when i write?!
i think i'll just do wht ms kwok suggested. write the question with big writing and put it in the pencil case. hah. alright people. take care... as well as the teachers from 0732. amusing and motivating talk pck gave. hah. we are all teachers, wow.
right... byebye! wun be here for some time, concert will just jam up our whole schedule...
OH OH!!! and YOU!! yes you, the one reading this very post. please please come for <> concert! u wun be disappointed, well, we will sing our best, so bring your ears!!
pls contact me for tickets. yes.. my hotline and my email's there.. just drop me a msg or smth. THANKS PPLE! <3
nights. (:
Saturday, March 29, 2008
sick....
sighh... i thought my post exam sickness curse has gone away.
but it never fails to pounce on me again.
sighhhh.... tmr ktv-ing.. how how how?!!??!
damn sian when ur whole nasal passage is clogged up. and feeling hot in the face, breathing hot air...and cold the rest of the body....
aight... shld post my journey today for orienteering on another day..
bye guys!!!
and dun fall sick.... =D
but it never fails to pounce on me again.
sighhhh.... tmr ktv-ing.. how how how?!!??!
damn sian when ur whole nasal passage is clogged up. and feeling hot in the face, breathing hot air...and cold the rest of the body....
aight... shld post my journey today for orienteering on another day..
bye guys!!!
and dun fall sick.... =D
Friday, March 28, 2008
slackerz
hey peeps!! =D today aint so bad after all..
cancelled the optician thing and went home to sleep.. after all its like damn rush...
sighh,.... canceled my date with my mum. hahaha.
anyway.. sorta looking forward to the sports carnival thing.
and PILLOWMAN. =D and my mumma's birthday.
another round of singing..
omg.. im really hooked on singing now.. hahhaa
i hear music in me! lol... music is my food.
poor neighbours...i will prolly receive a warning letter soon.
or they will put me in IMH or smth... quite near my place somemore. hAH!
had a rotter's life today, but had tuition so not soo bad...
omg... Jin Zi Cong really damn nice la!! hahahaa...
i want a guy like him too! hahaha.
O well, if u describe men and women as magnets... men will prolly be the north.. and out of all the south females.. im the only north one...
repelling those guys away...
HAHA. ok, i really have weird metaphors running in my head..
aight! gotta go sleep!!
tata pple!!
LOVES..
MWAHH
cancelled the optician thing and went home to sleep.. after all its like damn rush...
sighh,.... canceled my date with my mum. hahaha.
anyway.. sorta looking forward to the sports carnival thing.
and PILLOWMAN. =D and my mumma's birthday.
another round of singing..
omg.. im really hooked on singing now.. hahhaa
i hear music in me! lol... music is my food.
poor neighbours...i will prolly receive a warning letter soon.
or they will put me in IMH or smth... quite near my place somemore. hAH!
had a rotter's life today, but had tuition so not soo bad...
omg... Jin Zi Cong really damn nice la!! hahahaa...
i want a guy like him too! hahaha.
O well, if u describe men and women as magnets... men will prolly be the north.. and out of all the south females.. im the only north one...
repelling those guys away...
HAHA. ok, i really have weird metaphors running in my head..
aight! gotta go sleep!!
tata pple!!
LOVES..
MWAHH
Thursday, March 27, 2008
happiness, short lived.
papers ended today. yay.
but my phone passes on bad news to me.
choir tmr. sectionals.
right after blocks.
wow.
ok, i knw the concert's coming up and we shldnt complain.
but argghhh... plans for the whole day have been made. morning till night.
all planned.. and i still have to go out with my mamma tmr after the optician.
and wht? tuition!? wth.
watching Hooping Dulcinea, aka 鬥牛要不要
well, i shldnt be so grouchy..
but choir's really becoming a chore..
and i lost my voice from today's singing...
had fun with the girls today tho. =D
well, happiness are often short lived.
ok, shld look forward to choir tmr.
i'll try to.
but my phone passes on bad news to me.
choir tmr. sectionals.
right after blocks.
wow.
ok, i knw the concert's coming up and we shldnt complain.
but argghhh... plans for the whole day have been made. morning till night.
all planned.. and i still have to go out with my mamma tmr after the optician.
and wht? tuition!? wth.
watching Hooping Dulcinea, aka 鬥牛要不要
well, i shldnt be so grouchy..
but choir's really becoming a chore..
and i lost my voice from today's singing...
had fun with the girls today tho. =D
well, happiness are often short lived.
ok, shld look forward to choir tmr.
i'll try to.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Past Midnight ( memory)
sorry if there are mistakes. this is purely from my memory. hee
Past Midnight
i turn the light on to see if i am still there
the bulb creeps to life, resentful
at being roused to work. the dreary repertoire
which a discordant band went through a dozen times
during a neighbour's funeral, is stomping in my head.
i hum a classical tune, summon
the words of a sentimental song to expel the stubborn band.
the blaring trumpets cut them down in a single blow
life is perpetual unrest in
the house estates. the endless knockings,
the endless stampeding feet, the endless hurricanes of bad temper.
the eternal television, the thrashing of bodies.
and the endless rituals of life and death.
where is the point of stillness
mature art directs us to?
my mind veers crazily,
i turn of the light,
the bulb goes on burning inside.
yup, all from my memory. not bad a go. HAHA. love this poem.
beautiful solitude. =D
aight. getting back to JJ. not the SPOP guy duhh... the LPOP guy. haha!
Past Midnight
i turn the light on to see if i am still there
the bulb creeps to life, resentful
at being roused to work. the dreary repertoire
which a discordant band went through a dozen times
during a neighbour's funeral, is stomping in my head.
i hum a classical tune, summon
the words of a sentimental song to expel the stubborn band.
the blaring trumpets cut them down in a single blow
life is perpetual unrest in
the house estates. the endless knockings,
the endless stampeding feet, the endless hurricanes of bad temper.
the eternal television, the thrashing of bodies.
and the endless rituals of life and death.
where is the point of stillness
mature art directs us to?
my mind veers crazily,
i turn of the light,
the bulb goes on burning inside.
yup, all from my memory. not bad a go. HAHA. love this poem.
beautiful solitude. =D
aight. getting back to JJ. not the SPOP guy duhh... the LPOP guy. haha!
Last day of mugging for some time. at least.
Was studying at the library today again, with lester.
piles of books at our table, printed copies as well.
literature becomes a drag when you have examinations.
when theres a time limit and an exam scope.
damn the examinations.
damn the system.
damn!
I was just sitting at the same spot today and saw this quite cute guy. perhaps a tall version of ***
(hahaha. sorry bout the *** ) Oh well, he felt like a nice guy. HAH.
i was stoning and just looked at him while stoning, and i think he sorta realised that im "looking" at him. Right, amusing things happens between strangers. hahah
ok, i've got no idea why i'm still here. And since this is merely a textbox, i don't think it can, in any way, shoo me off this page.. argh, tmr's paper will be total thrash.
In the very first place, we have got no idea what kind of questions will be out to kill us, and we have not in much ways practiced for these 2 books, let alone an identity paper. what the hell is that? My England trip is so not my dream come true. its a say-bye-bye-to-me thing now. RAHHHHHHH. london bridge is falling down falling down falling down.....
ok, that was random, but thats me, welcome to my life. yerh. HAH
watched jeff duhman. omg, he totally rock my world!!
his humour and everything... the thing is... hes talking to himself!! which amuses me alot.. LOL..
i will post some vids of him up here soon. and trust me, ur sides will ache too.
aight. gotta go. yawns.
hate this.
BYE!
piles of books at our table, printed copies as well.
literature becomes a drag when you have examinations.
when theres a time limit and an exam scope.
damn the examinations.
damn the system.
damn!
I was just sitting at the same spot today and saw this quite cute guy. perhaps a tall version of ***
(hahaha. sorry bout the *** ) Oh well, he felt like a nice guy. HAH.
i was stoning and just looked at him while stoning, and i think he sorta realised that im "looking" at him. Right, amusing things happens between strangers. hahah
ok, i've got no idea why i'm still here. And since this is merely a textbox, i don't think it can, in any way, shoo me off this page.. argh, tmr's paper will be total thrash.
In the very first place, we have got no idea what kind of questions will be out to kill us, and we have not in much ways practiced for these 2 books, let alone an identity paper. what the hell is that? My England trip is so not my dream come true. its a say-bye-bye-to-me thing now. RAHHHHHHH. london bridge is falling down falling down falling down.....
ok, that was random, but thats me, welcome to my life. yerh. HAH
watched jeff duhman. omg, he totally rock my world!!
his humour and everything... the thing is... hes talking to himself!! which amuses me alot.. LOL..
i will post some vids of him up here soon. and trust me, ur sides will ache too.
aight. gotta go. yawns.
hate this.
BYE!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
the story starts today...
The smell of cinnamon feeds the hungry nostrils.
The self, curious and inquisitive, yearning to learn everything there is..
The bubbling curosity peeks in more,
as she remain in wait for the one, day by day, the youthful lass search in vain,
for that right moment, for that right feelings, for that right man.
For the love, that she has yet to comprehend.
it remains a mystery, an ambiguous word in her dictionary.
the definition not yet discovered and felt.
she creates her make-believe-world.
trying to find the happiness in her own famous-happy-ends.
the girl turns hungry for it,
when she sees her friends. one by one, all well fed.
may not be the right kind of food.
sometimes it tastes nice, sometimes it tastes bad,
giving you occasional tummyaches.
the girl cringed and winced as she feels her tummy growled,
and the heart, just being pieced back into one, chorusing in the growls.
its gone tired yearning, tired waiting for the right food to come..
assured with the one-in-this-world safety health label..
the label, with her name on it.
she breathe the air of caffine,
so tantalizing, so enticing, so inspiring.
the smell of art, the coffeebeans appear exotic to her.
something alluring and mysterious about it.
the poems she has on hand sets her into more thinking.
each white hair determines a new set of troubles and thoughts
The sudden rush of melancholy silences her usual humour.
even though the poems are simply just examinable syllabus,
her emotions brimmed from the literary writings on life, on the sufferings on the other side of the world.
sometimes the grass is not always greener on the other side..
she felt she took the very steps of the pilgrim and feeling the gloom loom.
she heaves a few sighs, just staring at the tourists who had just arrived.
hearing mixtures of japanese, cantonese....
The last paper's on thursday.
finally the break will come soon.
this expedition seemed never ending.
and this station, for a whole 2 years. seemed the most strenous among all
many times, she break.
the flaws and the mistakes.. keeps the tears brimming in the endless pit,
her tears never dries.
as she stumble into the myriad of thoughts about India,
a foreign voice penetrated through the string on thoughts...
she turned and sees an English couple.
they took an interest with what she was doing and strike up a conversation
they seemed to be in their late 50s, early 60s.
but despite their age, they look as fit as a fiddle.
their bond were inseparable, but when her husband left the table,
she said that it was good to have sometime alone when you have been together with someone for so long.. 33 years she said.. that you can make decisions without being obliged to compromise with the other..
its a form of freedom that couples will sacrifice..
they travel together at times, alone at times...
she watches in envy at the old blissful couple.
the lady shared loads of things.
some that even inspired her..
like doing what we want and like to do,
instead of doing what we have to.
As she munches on the McSpicy she grabs in her long fingers,
her face turns red (duh, its McSPICY for goodness sake.) she feels her entire nasal passage clogging up.
her hammocks containing some water now..
she can't take spiciness, not so much, yet.
putting down the half eaten lunch,
she left her seat.
the mirror shows how red her face was
the chilling water ran from the tap, through her fingers.
she looked up again.
she sees ME
The self, curious and inquisitive, yearning to learn everything there is..
The bubbling curosity peeks in more,
as she remain in wait for the one, day by day, the youthful lass search in vain,
for that right moment, for that right feelings, for that right man.
For the love, that she has yet to comprehend.
it remains a mystery, an ambiguous word in her dictionary.
the definition not yet discovered and felt.
she creates her make-believe-world.
trying to find the happiness in her own famous-happy-ends.
the girl turns hungry for it,
when she sees her friends. one by one, all well fed.
may not be the right kind of food.
sometimes it tastes nice, sometimes it tastes bad,
giving you occasional tummyaches.
the girl cringed and winced as she feels her tummy growled,
and the heart, just being pieced back into one, chorusing in the growls.
its gone tired yearning, tired waiting for the right food to come..
assured with the one-in-this-world safety health label..
the label, with her name on it.
she breathe the air of caffine,
so tantalizing, so enticing, so inspiring.
the smell of art, the coffeebeans appear exotic to her.
something alluring and mysterious about it.
the poems she has on hand sets her into more thinking.
each white hair determines a new set of troubles and thoughts
The sudden rush of melancholy silences her usual humour.
even though the poems are simply just examinable syllabus,
her emotions brimmed from the literary writings on life, on the sufferings on the other side of the world.
sometimes the grass is not always greener on the other side..
she felt she took the very steps of the pilgrim and feeling the gloom loom.
she heaves a few sighs, just staring at the tourists who had just arrived.
hearing mixtures of japanese, cantonese....
The last paper's on thursday.
finally the break will come soon.
this expedition seemed never ending.
and this station, for a whole 2 years. seemed the most strenous among all
many times, she break.
the flaws and the mistakes.. keeps the tears brimming in the endless pit,
her tears never dries.
as she stumble into the myriad of thoughts about India,
a foreign voice penetrated through the string on thoughts...
she turned and sees an English couple.
they took an interest with what she was doing and strike up a conversation
they seemed to be in their late 50s, early 60s.
but despite their age, they look as fit as a fiddle.
their bond were inseparable, but when her husband left the table,
she said that it was good to have sometime alone when you have been together with someone for so long.. 33 years she said.. that you can make decisions without being obliged to compromise with the other..
its a form of freedom that couples will sacrifice..
they travel together at times, alone at times...
she watches in envy at the old blissful couple.
the lady shared loads of things.
some that even inspired her..
like doing what we want and like to do,
instead of doing what we have to.
As she munches on the McSpicy she grabs in her long fingers,
her face turns red (duh, its McSPICY for goodness sake.) she feels her entire nasal passage clogging up.
her hammocks containing some water now..
she can't take spiciness, not so much, yet.
putting down the half eaten lunch,
she left her seat.
the mirror shows how red her face was
the chilling water ran from the tap, through her fingers.
she looked up again.
she sees ME
Monday, March 24, 2008
rubiks cube
in progress...
i think im really slow with this.
hahaha. the videos seemed idiot proof..
but with me around...
ahahahaha.. the statement will fail. LOL
i think im really slow with this.
hahaha. the videos seemed idiot proof..
but with me around...
ahahahaha.. the statement will fail. LOL
Sunday, March 23, 2008
the tragic emptiness
its late, i know.
the later the night delves into its hearts
the deeper my hole sinks.
engulfing all the darkness..
burrowing into the endless pit.
reading shakespeare's tragedy aint such a nice thing to do.
no, it definitely won't fill up the emptiness
pls ignore the quotes below, just wanna practice. HAHAHA. we cant bring the book in. sighh.
this verse here, serves some form of irony to me.
it is supposedly, a profession of love.
a bold thing to do infront of the senates.
but yet, within the boldness..
in her words, surfaces and highlights the nature of subservience.
so afterall, the adventurous spirit is not so after all.
my noble father
I do perceived a divided duty:
To you, i am bound for life and education;
My life and education both do learn me
How to respect you. You are lord of all my duty
I am in hitherto you daughter. But here's my husband;
and so much duty as my mother showed
To you, preferring you before her father,
So much i challenge that i profess
Due to the moor my lord
(1.3.178-87)
the profession of love being one thing, and having a repetition of "duty" for 3 times accentuates her acceptance of the subservient role mandated even by the consensual, companionate marital model.
quotes of love:
desdemona to othello--
I saw Othellows visage in his mind
And to his honours and his valiant parts
Did I my soul and fortunes consecrate
(1.3.248 - 50)
on money : ( the first and the last lines )
That thou, Iago, who hast had my purse (1.1.2)
and seize upon the fortunes of the Moor (5.2.363)
the first one, being Iago using Roderigo's money.
so we can see how scheming Iago is from the start
and we can see from the second one, that despite the Moor having suicide and dead.
his fortunes are taken away.
is this a representation of another issue on race. of him being a Moor??
are you people bored??
confused?
yeah, i am too.
hahaha, sometimes its just too controversial and too many ideas jumbled up.
such that having one quote for one meaning would actually mean the other.
end up, i just contradict myself.
to think or not to think, thats my question.
the later the night delves into its hearts
the deeper my hole sinks.
engulfing all the darkness..
burrowing into the endless pit.
reading shakespeare's tragedy aint such a nice thing to do.
no, it definitely won't fill up the emptiness
pls ignore the quotes below, just wanna practice. HAHAHA. we cant bring the book in. sighh.
this verse here, serves some form of irony to me.
it is supposedly, a profession of love.
a bold thing to do infront of the senates.
but yet, within the boldness..
in her words, surfaces and highlights the nature of subservience.
so afterall, the adventurous spirit is not so after all.
my noble father
I do perceived a divided duty:
To you, i am bound for life and education;
My life and education both do learn me
How to respect you. You are lord of all my duty
I am in hitherto you daughter. But here's my husband;
and so much duty as my mother showed
To you, preferring you before her father,
So much i challenge that i profess
Due to the moor my lord
(1.3.178-87)
the profession of love being one thing, and having a repetition of "duty" for 3 times accentuates her acceptance of the subservient role mandated even by the consensual, companionate marital model.
quotes of love:
desdemona to othello--
I saw Othellows visage in his mind
And to his honours and his valiant parts
Did I my soul and fortunes consecrate
(1.3.248 - 50)
on money : ( the first and the last lines )
That thou, Iago, who hast had my purse (1.1.2)
and seize upon the fortunes of the Moor (5.2.363)
the first one, being Iago using Roderigo's money.
so we can see how scheming Iago is from the start
and we can see from the second one, that despite the Moor having suicide and dead.
his fortunes are taken away.
is this a representation of another issue on race. of him being a Moor??
are you people bored??
confused?
yeah, i am too.
hahaha, sometimes its just too controversial and too many ideas jumbled up.
such that having one quote for one meaning would actually mean the other.
end up, i just contradict myself.
to think or not to think, thats my question.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
shelved up
OMG..... recently im so insecured..
i may just be left on the shelf!!!!!
i don't have too many years to spare..!!
and with time flying and him still not in sight!!
gosh gosh gosh...
i don't wanna be like Li-Ann.
don't even have her own kid!
ahahha. im thinking too much
maybe i shld have just gone for those blind dates..
lol!
okay.. u guys may think im insane for thinking about this at the age of 17+++
but seriously times flies..
i may just blog 5 years later with the same thing!!!
plus my so-manly-me character.
i think i will be shelved up.
collecting dust and cobwebs
rahhhhhh
aight.. bless my friends who are absorbing happiness like spongebob.
i'll be like patrick and try to get abit from them. hahahaha
lit is making me insane..
no fear shakespeare.
have fear eileen!
LOL
i may just be left on the shelf!!!!!
i don't have too many years to spare..!!
and with time flying and him still not in sight!!
gosh gosh gosh...
i don't wanna be like Li-Ann.
don't even have her own kid!
ahahha. im thinking too much
maybe i shld have just gone for those blind dates..
lol!
okay.. u guys may think im insane for thinking about this at the age of 17+++
but seriously times flies..
i may just blog 5 years later with the same thing!!!
plus my so-manly-me character.
i think i will be shelved up.
collecting dust and cobwebs
rahhhhhh
aight.. bless my friends who are absorbing happiness like spongebob.
i'll be like patrick and try to get abit from them. hahahaha
lit is making me insane..
no fear shakespeare.
have fear eileen!
LOL
Friday, March 21, 2008
The Leap Years ( again? )
not again, this time round's the movie.
lovely music, beautiful plot, amazing setting.
how breath taking singapore can look.
everything about it is simply BEAUTIFUL.
Thank you Dr. Catherine Lim, for coming with such an intriguing plot.
touching right into our hearts and souls.
thanks to the producer and the music director and everyone involved for the great show put up.
really, it gave me a huge impact.
the lines from William shakespeare, oscar wilde, and even einstein...
all mean so much.... ( they have to after all.. )
but these, are simply reminders to us.
to stop and think about life.
think about how much we've missed
how much we are trying to avoid.
and yet ending up with the same ending.
so, moral of story. face it. accept fate, even though if it comes right smack on your face. don't hide. don't run.....
haha. the whole idea is sooooooooo very beautiful...
and the songs are melting me...
finally, corrine may is heard.
such a good voice and yet so little coverage in singapore..
not many knows her..
i hope people do love her music after watching the movie..
im so getting the OST..
i wanna go up to the OCBC tower to throw airplanes too... i'll bring a whole suit case as well....
and let the wind tell you how much i missed you.
the you i've never met.
but always been somewhere in my world,
just that we are all to busy to meet.
so i let the wind blow u my desires.
my burning desire for you,
whom i have known for so long,
yet not know who you are..
omgawd... im drifting off to the metaphysical again.. hahaahha
something so intangible..
so unpractical.
so wrong in this pragmatic society.
who cares, this is MY WORLD.
MY OWN WORLD.
lovely music, beautiful plot, amazing setting.
how breath taking singapore can look.
everything about it is simply BEAUTIFUL.
Thank you Dr. Catherine Lim, for coming with such an intriguing plot.
touching right into our hearts and souls.
thanks to the producer and the music director and everyone involved for the great show put up.
really, it gave me a huge impact.
the lines from William shakespeare, oscar wilde, and even einstein...
all mean so much.... ( they have to after all.. )
but these, are simply reminders to us.
to stop and think about life.
think about how much we've missed
how much we are trying to avoid.
and yet ending up with the same ending.
so, moral of story. face it. accept fate, even though if it comes right smack on your face. don't hide. don't run.....
haha. the whole idea is sooooooooo very beautiful...
and the songs are melting me...
finally, corrine may is heard.
such a good voice and yet so little coverage in singapore..
not many knows her..
i hope people do love her music after watching the movie..
im so getting the OST..
i wanna go up to the OCBC tower to throw airplanes too... i'll bring a whole suit case as well....
and let the wind tell you how much i missed you.
the you i've never met.
but always been somewhere in my world,
just that we are all to busy to meet.
so i let the wind blow u my desires.
my burning desire for you,
whom i have known for so long,
yet not know who you are..
omgawd... im drifting off to the metaphysical again.. hahaahha
something so intangible..
so unpractical.
so wrong in this pragmatic society.
who cares, this is MY WORLD.
MY OWN WORLD.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
其實很愛你
其實很愛你( 偶像劇 屋頂上的綠寶石 主題曲 )
張韶涵作詞：黃漢青 ( F.I.R ) 桃子
作曲：黃漢青 ( F.I.R ) 編曲：林於賢
離開 不會太悲傷有些
心情該釋放直到
眼淚它自己落下才發現騙不了自己其實很愛你
現在 學著去遺忘躲開
有你的地方回憶
被誰放在書架上把它從最高的地方
落下感動越是深刻
寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕
像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由
挽留現在
學著去遺忘躲開
有你的地方回憶
被誰放在書架上把它從最高的地方
落下感動越是深刻 寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由 挽留感動越是深刻
寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕
像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由 挽留
張韶涵作詞：黃漢青 ( F.I.R ) 桃子
作曲：黃漢青 ( F.I.R ) 編曲：林於賢
離開 不會太悲傷有些
心情該釋放直到
眼淚它自己落下才發現騙不了自己其實很愛你
現在 學著去遺忘躲開
有你的地方回憶
被誰放在書架上把它從最高的地方
落下感動越是深刻
寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕
像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由
挽留現在
學著去遺忘躲開
有你的地方回憶
被誰放在書架上把它從最高的地方
落下感動越是深刻 寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由 挽留感動越是深刻
寂寞就越傷人
OH ~每個人的心裡都會有一段傷痕
像白紙的天真
反覆被你傷的好深相愛不需要理由
離開也沒有理由 挽留
LOST
its not a good sign when im frequently up here.
because this means that i need a getaway.
who is Eileen?
what is she like?
lame? weird/eccentric?/short?/retarded?/foolish?/childish?
to some... i'm able to handle stuffs, able to talk sense into some, able to provide advice and assurance.
but i feel i'm lacking the power to assure,
because somehow i cant persuade myself that i will be fine in this world as well..
i like to be there for my friends.
but sometimes. its hard......
the feeling unexplanatory, and even unknown.
despite all the pilosophies of life i've vommited out...
despite all the flowery perceptions of mine...
i'm not what i say.
ok... im really drained. emotionally this time..
i need a fall back. just a firm shoulder to be there for me.
a smile i can think of when my day needs some light.
a warming embrace to dry the tears away.
to send the shivers away.
bringing my smiles back again.
an authentic smile.
someone to find my identity back.
to remove the layers of wall
and free me and my soul.
because this means that i need a getaway.
who is Eileen?
what is she like?
lame? weird/eccentric?/short?/retarded?/foolish?/childish?
to some... i'm able to handle stuffs, able to talk sense into some, able to provide advice and assurance.
but i feel i'm lacking the power to assure,
because somehow i cant persuade myself that i will be fine in this world as well..
i like to be there for my friends.
but sometimes. its hard......
the feeling unexplanatory, and even unknown.
despite all the pilosophies of life i've vommited out...
despite all the flowery perceptions of mine...
i'm not what i say.
ok... im really drained. emotionally this time..
i need a fall back. just a firm shoulder to be there for me.
a smile i can think of when my day needs some light.
a warming embrace to dry the tears away.
to send the shivers away.
bringing my smiles back again.
an authentic smile.
someone to find my identity back.
to remove the layers of wall
and free me and my soul.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Friday, March 14, 2008
interrogation room
heyya whoever's reading this.
its "Past Midnight"
shall share the poem by Boey Kim Cheng here...
Past Midnight
I turn the light on to see if i am still there
the bulb creeps to life, resentful
at being roused to work. The dreary repertoire
which a discordant band went through a dozen times
during a neighbour's funeral, is stomping
in my head. I hum a classical tune, summon
the words of a sentimental song
to expel the stubborn band. The blaring trumpets
cut them down with a single blow
Life is perpetual unrest
inthe housing estates. the endless knockings
the stampeding feet, the hurricanes of bad temper,
the eternal television, the thrashing bodies,
the endless rituals of life and death
where is the point of stillness
mature art directs us to?
my mind veers crazily.
i turn the light off.
the bulb goes on burning inside.
this poem gave me alot of images.
the reason im posting it up here...
is the coincidence of having a wake at the void deck
however, it is not producing much sounds,
could be due to my aircon, i do not know.
the of past midnight gives me alot of thoughts..
the interrogation room.
dark, cold and still.
with that shining lamp, the burning bulb in my head.
interrogating my very own thoughts.
questioning and questioning.
forcing every single cell to strip naked.
to be true, to be seen through...
the lamp shining, the bulb burning.
the night shunning, the darkness encircling..
so still on the outside, but the bulb burns,
sending the flames leapin' movin' within'
yet it remain still. on the outside..
so cold on the outside, but the bulb burns,
setting the soul on fire.
leavin' me in a pile.
pile of soot in the hood.
till its end, it remained in the hood.
hidden, and faceless.
thats how the night goes,
like the interrogation room.
its "Past Midnight"
shall share the poem by Boey Kim Cheng here...
Past Midnight
I turn the light on to see if i am still there
the bulb creeps to life, resentful
at being roused to work. The dreary repertoire
which a discordant band went through a dozen times
during a neighbour's funeral, is stomping
in my head. I hum a classical tune, summon
the words of a sentimental song
to expel the stubborn band. The blaring trumpets
cut them down with a single blow
Life is perpetual unrest
inthe housing estates. the endless knockings
the stampeding feet, the hurricanes of bad temper,
the eternal television, the thrashing bodies,
the endless rituals of life and death
where is the point of stillness
mature art directs us to?
my mind veers crazily.
i turn the light off.
the bulb goes on burning inside.
this poem gave me alot of images.
the reason im posting it up here...
is the coincidence of having a wake at the void deck
however, it is not producing much sounds,
could be due to my aircon, i do not know.
the of past midnight gives me alot of thoughts..
the interrogation room.
dark, cold and still.
with that shining lamp, the burning bulb in my head.
interrogating my very own thoughts.
questioning and questioning.
forcing every single cell to strip naked.
to be true, to be seen through...
the lamp shining, the bulb burning.
the night shunning, the darkness encircling..
so still on the outside, but the bulb burns,
sending the flames leapin' movin' within'
yet it remain still. on the outside..
so cold on the outside, but the bulb burns,
setting the soul on fire.
leavin' me in a pile.
pile of soot in the hood.
till its end, it remained in the hood.
hidden, and faceless.
thats how the night goes,
like the interrogation room.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
T3
Bonjour!!
taking a break to print math stuff and rot..
been doing nth the whole day...
except eating and sleeping and tv..
hahaha, forgot about block test suddenly...
and tt felt good..
=X
been looking for the mock paper for the whole hour..
they shld just have huge labels and neon signs to link us there la!
such an impt thing yet hidden in such a secluded place. ahhaha
issit just me??
anyway... been mugging at T3 macs...
totally rocks.... nice ambience,
it feels "out of the world"
beautiful alieniation i wld say.
at least to me it is..
POPEYE'S was DAMN NICE...
the food rocks.. and not to forget the cartoon which i haven watched in ages
i rmb i cried watching it. hahaha... coz popeye nearly wasnt in time to save Olive from that terrible monster. hahaha.
anyway.... jiayou for those who are chionging as well..
yupp!!
and i so want to clear my name... prank msges are initiated and sent by faith yang. ( i was of no involvement, other seeing my phone being violated )
yes. i want back my name, my identity.
i'm coming clean..
taking a break to print math stuff and rot..
been doing nth the whole day...
except eating and sleeping and tv..
hahaha, forgot about block test suddenly...
and tt felt good..
=X
been looking for the mock paper for the whole hour..
they shld just have huge labels and neon signs to link us there la!
such an impt thing yet hidden in such a secluded place. ahhaha
issit just me??
anyway... been mugging at T3 macs...
totally rocks.... nice ambience,
it feels "out of the world"
beautiful alieniation i wld say.
at least to me it is..
POPEYE'S was DAMN NICE...
the food rocks.. and not to forget the cartoon which i haven watched in ages
i rmb i cried watching it. hahaha... coz popeye nearly wasnt in time to save Olive from that terrible monster. hahaha.
anyway.... jiayou for those who are chionging as well..
yupp!!
and i so want to clear my name... prank msges are initiated and sent by faith yang. ( i was of no involvement, other seeing my phone being violated )
yes. i want back my name, my identity.
i'm coming clean..
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Leap of Love
Finished the leap of love today, the movie was adapted from Catherine Lim's novella.
one of the best love novels I've read, one closest to my heart at the moment.
our prospect towards love, irritatingly romantic and idealistic.
like her (Li-Ann) , i have to fall in love with LOVE before i can fall in love with a HIM
when would he appear? i would know with a certainty of the heart that surpassed any understanding by the mind, inferior organ by far, in the eternal human quest. i would know when place and person came together in the moment of Love's epiphany. The road to Love's Damascus had is blinding lights too: she would be dazzled for one moment then get up, rub her eyes and come face to face with the promised presence waiting at the end of the road.
now, none claimed any part of my heart. a heart rich and abundant, ready for the claiming and the claimant stood somewhere along the path. Fate will lead me. At some point, Fate ever a gentle benign presence, would stop, bend down and whisper. " That's HIM ", that point, will be the closure of a chapter of ardent search and opening the next one of joyous meeting, discovery, fulfilment, and love.
Fate being an amazing thing, comes swiftly and swoop past before you know it.
i believe in fate, not just between lovers but also friends, family and even strangers.
strangers are just friends whom you yet to know, yet to understand, yet to love.
i believe in the seemingly childish and perhaps even lame belief, that someone somewhere out there is thinking of you when you coincidentally sees the time "11:11" it sounds dumb, but that belief gives me surprise, gives me that short- lasting , perhaps a 3 seconds worth of happiness and love. Afterall, if it is a belief that brings happiness and a smile, so why not believe in something though silly, gives you joy.
this random thought just came into my mind when i was walking from the school to the station, where do people bury responsibility and guilt?
is there a pit for it?
why do some find it so hard to shove it away, to take a break and not feel guilt, to step into a train and not be guilty and worried taking a seat that someone else might need it more than me, or to have to help not because it does you good ( sometimes you hurt urself in the course of helping) yet, feels a need to, because of the obligations, and the guilt that comes along if you do not give out your hand. whereas some can just push the responsibilities and not feel anything?
i could just walk on the streets and feel bad when i see an old person carrying something heavy and i feel the need to help, yet helpless when i see how withdrawn they are. i step into the train and not dare to sit even when theres empty seats, afraid that someone comes, in a need of a place to seat. the guilt and all, happening every single moment. so "pip-ish", yet so me. sighhhh... if only, i can find the pit, i'll dump half the guilt, half my "busy-bodiness" , half of my sensitivity...
hahaha, but the main thing i wanna blog about was about the leap of love la... its just so romantic, so heart wrenching, so sweet it makes u wanna fall in love immediately. yehhhh, i feel like falling in love all over again...... >< sighhs....
as i waste the night in sighs......... i picture you in my mind.. the eyes... so mysterious, pulling me to you... then again, pulls back to reality. =.=
MUSIC AT THE MO:
1) Hardest Thing - 98 Degrees
2) Someones Watching over me - Hilary Duff
3) Beautiful - Christina
4) Until i find you again - Richard Marx
5) Wu Ding ( Rooftop?!) - Jay Chou and Landy
6) This I swear - Nick Lachey =DDDD
7) reflection - Coco Lee's rendition of it. =D
8) Nobody's home - Avril Lavigne
one of the best love novels I've read, one closest to my heart at the moment.
our prospect towards love, irritatingly romantic and idealistic.
like her (Li-Ann) , i have to fall in love with LOVE before i can fall in love with a HIM
when would he appear? i would know with a certainty of the heart that surpassed any understanding by the mind, inferior organ by far, in the eternal human quest. i would know when place and person came together in the moment of Love's epiphany. The road to Love's Damascus had is blinding lights too: she would be dazzled for one moment then get up, rub her eyes and come face to face with the promised presence waiting at the end of the road.
now, none claimed any part of my heart. a heart rich and abundant, ready for the claiming and the claimant stood somewhere along the path. Fate will lead me. At some point, Fate ever a gentle benign presence, would stop, bend down and whisper. " That's HIM ", that point, will be the closure of a chapter of ardent search and opening the next one of joyous meeting, discovery, fulfilment, and love.
Fate being an amazing thing, comes swiftly and swoop past before you know it.
i believe in fate, not just between lovers but also friends, family and even strangers.
strangers are just friends whom you yet to know, yet to understand, yet to love.
i believe in the seemingly childish and perhaps even lame belief, that someone somewhere out there is thinking of you when you coincidentally sees the time "11:11" it sounds dumb, but that belief gives me surprise, gives me that short- lasting , perhaps a 3 seconds worth of happiness and love. Afterall, if it is a belief that brings happiness and a smile, so why not believe in something though silly, gives you joy.
this random thought just came into my mind when i was walking from the school to the station, where do people bury responsibility and guilt?
is there a pit for it?
why do some find it so hard to shove it away, to take a break and not feel guilt, to step into a train and not be guilty and worried taking a seat that someone else might need it more than me, or to have to help not because it does you good ( sometimes you hurt urself in the course of helping) yet, feels a need to, because of the obligations, and the guilt that comes along if you do not give out your hand. whereas some can just push the responsibilities and not feel anything?
i could just walk on the streets and feel bad when i see an old person carrying something heavy and i feel the need to help, yet helpless when i see how withdrawn they are. i step into the train and not dare to sit even when theres empty seats, afraid that someone comes, in a need of a place to seat. the guilt and all, happening every single moment. so "pip-ish", yet so me. sighhhh... if only, i can find the pit, i'll dump half the guilt, half my "busy-bodiness" , half of my sensitivity...
hahaha, but the main thing i wanna blog about was about the leap of love la... its just so romantic, so heart wrenching, so sweet it makes u wanna fall in love immediately. yehhhh, i feel like falling in love all over again...... >< sighhs....
as i waste the night in sighs......... i picture you in my mind.. the eyes... so mysterious, pulling me to you... then again, pulls back to reality. =.=
MUSIC AT THE MO:
1) Hardest Thing - 98 Degrees
2) Someones Watching over me - Hilary Duff
3) Beautiful - Christina
4) Until i find you again - Richard Marx
5) Wu Ding ( Rooftop?!) - Jay Chou and Landy
6) This I swear - Nick Lachey =DDDD
7) reflection - Coco Lee's rendition of it. =D
8) Nobody's home - Avril Lavigne
Thursday, March 6, 2008
| - EILEEN |
modulus don't work for me.
went for the well being rep meeting today.
the role play thing and the situation...
feels really like me after getting back my econs paper everytime
and i think the counsellors methods will really make things worse la..
whts with... " i knw how it feels.. NO ONE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS. IT WILL ONLY MAKE MATTERS WORSE SAYING THAT. "
haha, and thinking about it made me close to tears at the point of time
been really tired and sick recently..
both physically and emotionally..
and whatever that is...
i feel like i really need the peace and quiet in my thundering mind
need some kind of solace and solitude.
some time to really space out and just clear the loads in my heart and mind
and my water bill been really high..
i guess my water tap's faulty...
needa plumber..
needa tailor, to sew back the wounds.
needa surgeon to put up the plaster smiles
need an architect to build up the walls that crumbled.
need a LIFESAVER, to save my life from the drowning waters
need a BREAK.
im faulty. spoilt and malfunctioned
went for the well being rep meeting today.
the role play thing and the situation...
feels really like me after getting back my econs paper everytime
and i think the counsellors methods will really make things worse la..
whts with... " i knw how it feels.. NO ONE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS. IT WILL ONLY MAKE MATTERS WORSE SAYING THAT. "
haha, and thinking about it made me close to tears at the point of time
been really tired and sick recently..
both physically and emotionally..
and whatever that is...
i feel like i really need the peace and quiet in my thundering mind
need some kind of solace and solitude.
some time to really space out and just clear the loads in my heart and mind
and my water bill been really high..
i guess my water tap's faulty...
needa plumber..
needa tailor, to sew back the wounds.
needa surgeon to put up the plaster smiles
need an architect to build up the walls that crumbled.
need a LIFESAVER, to save my life from the drowning waters
need a BREAK.
im faulty. spoilt and malfunctioned
a song. for the unloved
"Song For The Unloved"
Hey..This one is for the mothers
Who've lost a child
This one is for the gypsies
Who left their hearts behind
This is for the strangers
Sleeping in my heart
Take what they want
And leave while it's still dark
[Bridge]
No one is glamourouslyLonely,
all by themselves
[Chorus]This is a song for the unloved
This is a music for one last cry
This is a prayer that tomorrow will help me leave the past behind
It's a song for the unloved (the unloved)
This one's for the bridesmaid
Never the bride
This one's for the dreamers
Who locked their faith inside
This is for the widows
Who think there's only one
The dying fathers that never told their sons
No one is glamourously, lonelyFollow your heart
[Chorus repeat]
Ohh Tomorrow the sun will shine
And dry the tears in your eyes
Suddenly love comes alive
For one last cryJust one last cry
[Chorus repeat x2]
Hey..This one is for the mothers
Who've lost a child
This one is for the gypsies
Who left their hearts behind
This is for the strangers
Sleeping in my heart
Take what they want
And leave while it's still dark
[Bridge]
No one is glamourouslyLonely,
all by themselves
[Chorus]This is a song for the unloved
This is a music for one last cry
This is a prayer that tomorrow will help me leave the past behind
It's a song for the unloved (the unloved)
This one's for the bridesmaid
Never the bride
This one's for the dreamers
Who locked their faith inside
This is for the widows
Who think there's only one
The dying fathers that never told their sons
No one is glamourously, lonelyFollow your heart
[Chorus repeat]
Ohh Tomorrow the sun will shine
And dry the tears in your eyes
Suddenly love comes alive
For one last cryJust one last cry
[Chorus repeat x2]
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
moment of ephiphany
when will my revelation come?
where i find my answers to the many questions and doubts.
hungry for answers, hungry for realization.
i wonder why my puny brain works so differently from others,
not faster, but much much slower.. retardation, i often call it. some name it blureness, whichever way you want it.. im just S-L-O-W.
nice record i broke today, first time in my whole entire life where my econs test didn't rank last.
( i always did. never fail to not.. ) not something to be proud of. but i'm a little glad.. just a little, i made that really milli nano "improvement", "its just one mark, you're as bad" she said. used to it...shes also used to the "dumb-script = dumb grades " kinda thing for me, so she didnt even bother to ask me what happen... yupp. but none prolly know how it feels, coz sometimes i don't get the feelin myself. i think my posts are always so dark and depressing... sorry ><
i know readers prolly have that " cmon, i know how u feel and u are not dumb.." kinda expression and thought in them already, but seriously, don't say you understand how it feels to anyone, because, its really hard or rather impossible to really feel the same way as the subjected person. its really not the same, because we are who we are, and no one can replace anything about who we are... its our IDENTITY. (wow, am i doing too much literature? - i think i did. hah)
literature is an amazing subject. and mrs teo really really enlighten us. ( as quoted from faith) but i do agree strongly as well. that half an hour is really so productive, so much more than the prev hour of lesson. HAHA. woops. everyone knows who or what i'm talking about.. but i really don't wanna be that direct ( no offense )
the week's been really stressing and hectic.. with what? so far 3 choir practices alrdy?! (Mon, tues and wed. ) wow right... and guess where we find time??? hahaha, nawhhh... its hiding well, just can't find it.. TIME!! where are you?!.... aight.. i know i know.. the time im squandering on blogging... but aint it a release, a stress reliever, so that i can unload some of it and walk off with lighter weights on my shoulders?
was talking to mx just now... been ages since i talked to her like that.. and about guys.. wow.. leen talks about guys now. hahahaa. sorry, just that i'm talking so much on girls that people really will question my sexual orientation. FYI. yes im 100% straight. as straight as parallel lines.. hetero. normal and very sane. just a little prejudiced against man, and constant stereotyping. woops. sorry to the guys out there. hah. school work took such a toll on me that i actually forgotten everything about bgf and stuffs.. leaving me with no time to think about anyone,.. and when someone ask.. do you even eyecandy any guys... it was hard for me to cough out an answer... hahah! sorry not that im saying no one looks good or im in any position to s ay anything ( ok, i look abit less than fuggly but near there. ) ->> notice... the intensity of ugliness is decreasing... dr/dt) hahaha. no pun intended. aight.. back ta the topic.. yeahh.. im just rather numb...............towards L-O-V-E.
ok... ive been getting on for long........... and all of you are prolly really really bored and dozing off.. (that is if anyone is reading.. ) i desperately want $$$$.. oh oh!! great great news! i'm going for Pillowman!!! yayness la!!! finally... i've been wanting to watch since forever...its gonna be great.... so.. pls pple get the tixs if u havent. it rocks totally =D ... i keep digressing..my train of consciousness is really like stephen dedalus... sama sama.. LOL... as i was sayingg... i needed $$$$ to shop!!!! hah. i wanna go for a kinno spree... getting all the books on hot shelves... getting nice notebooks. ( i really like them. for their everything.. i never get bored of them ) i need a new wallet. a cardigan ( not for u dom!) , and many many many other stuffs.... >< and i've been spending all my money on food!!! dammit..... growing horizontally.. i feel like a compressed can of food. hahaha! weird imagery and metaphor. ignore me...
ok.. ive been rambling on for god knows why ( and i don't )...... making nonsensical statements and im just typing weird stuffs.. freaking the hell out of my friends.. yes.. this is stil eileen.. no one kidnapped her... no worries ( even tho u guys may want it to happen O.O ) hahhaah.
ok... i think u get wht i mean...so... gotta go zonk off to my bed alrdy...
nightey nights pple!!
loads of <3
MWAHH
CIAO!!
where i find my answers to the many questions and doubts.
hungry for answers, hungry for realization.
i wonder why my puny brain works so differently from others,
not faster, but much much slower.. retardation, i often call it. some name it blureness, whichever way you want it.. im just S-L-O-W.
nice record i broke today, first time in my whole entire life where my econs test didn't rank last.
( i always did. never fail to not.. ) not something to be proud of. but i'm a little glad.. just a little, i made that really milli nano "improvement", "its just one mark, you're as bad" she said. used to it...shes also used to the "dumb-script = dumb grades " kinda thing for me, so she didnt even bother to ask me what happen... yupp. but none prolly know how it feels, coz sometimes i don't get the feelin myself. i think my posts are always so dark and depressing... sorry ><
i know readers prolly have that " cmon, i know how u feel and u are not dumb.." kinda expression and thought in them already, but seriously, don't say you understand how it feels to anyone, because, its really hard or rather impossible to really feel the same way as the subjected person. its really not the same, because we are who we are, and no one can replace anything about who we are... its our IDENTITY. (wow, am i doing too much literature? - i think i did. hah)
literature is an amazing subject. and mrs teo really really enlighten us. ( as quoted from faith) but i do agree strongly as well. that half an hour is really so productive, so much more than the prev hour of lesson. HAHA. woops. everyone knows who or what i'm talking about.. but i really don't wanna be that direct ( no offense )
the week's been really stressing and hectic.. with what? so far 3 choir practices alrdy?! (Mon, tues and wed. ) wow right... and guess where we find time??? hahaha, nawhhh... its hiding well, just can't find it.. TIME!! where are you?!.... aight.. i know i know.. the time im squandering on blogging... but aint it a release, a stress reliever, so that i can unload some of it and walk off with lighter weights on my shoulders?
was talking to mx just now... been ages since i talked to her like that.. and about guys.. wow.. leen talks about guys now. hahahaa. sorry, just that i'm talking so much on girls that people really will question my sexual orientation. FYI. yes im 100% straight. as straight as parallel lines.. hetero. normal and very sane. just a little prejudiced against man, and constant stereotyping. woops. sorry to the guys out there. hah. school work took such a toll on me that i actually forgotten everything about bgf and stuffs.. leaving me with no time to think about anyone,.. and when someone ask.. do you even eyecandy any guys... it was hard for me to cough out an answer... hahah! sorry not that im saying no one looks good or im in any position to s ay anything ( ok, i look abit less than fuggly but near there. ) ->> notice... the intensity of ugliness is decreasing... dr/dt) hahaha. no pun intended. aight.. back ta the topic.. yeahh.. im just rather numb...............towards L-O-V-E.
ok... ive been getting on for long........... and all of you are prolly really really bored and dozing off.. (that is if anyone is reading.. ) i desperately want $$$$.. oh oh!! great great news! i'm going for Pillowman!!! yayness la!!! finally... i've been wanting to watch since forever...its gonna be great.... so.. pls pple get the tixs if u havent. it rocks totally =D ... i keep digressing..my train of consciousness is really like stephen dedalus... sama sama.. LOL... as i was sayingg... i needed $$$$ to shop!!!! hah. i wanna go for a kinno spree... getting all the books on hot shelves... getting nice notebooks. ( i really like them. for their everything.. i never get bored of them ) i need a new wallet. a cardigan ( not for u dom!) , and many many many other stuffs.... >< and i've been spending all my money on food!!! dammit..... growing horizontally.. i feel like a compressed can of food. hahaha! weird imagery and metaphor. ignore me...
ok.. ive been rambling on for god knows why ( and i don't )...... making nonsensical statements and im just typing weird stuffs.. freaking the hell out of my friends.. yes.. this is stil eileen.. no one kidnapped her... no worries ( even tho u guys may want it to happen O.O ) hahhaah.
ok... i think u get wht i mean...so... gotta go zonk off to my bed alrdy...
nightey nights pple!!
loads of <3
MWAHH
CIAO!!
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
dead, revived, dead again.
been so caught up with school work and choir...
sleep, i've been missing it all..
other than dozing off and not realizing it until someone pokes me.
is that sleeping? how can i stop myself from sleeping when i don't even know when i've alrdy dozed off...
its not simple for those who do not understand..
i believe everyone has different minds, different thinking, different body conditions..
please do not show that you understand when u you truly don't.
coz im confused myself.
i need my own revelation... sighhhh
crisis moment. is this?
a time when u think that life is nothing but a process of death..
when all the things you go through now, all the unhappiness, all the laughter, all the tears..
all the sleepless nights.. all the As and "Papers"... all boils down to nothing in the end.. does it?
sorry, but you're reading a cynic's blog. so parden my pessimism here... prolly end after my As... which is dumb ranting now, coz i know that after As... these entries will only be seen as nothing...
really.... when u pass the certain stages in life.. crucial it may seem at that point of time... but in the end, it dosent really matter...
im just tired.. and blabbering nonsense.. again.....
ok... my bed's calling out to me... tata~
sleep, i've been missing it all..
other than dozing off and not realizing it until someone pokes me.
is that sleeping? how can i stop myself from sleeping when i don't even know when i've alrdy dozed off...
its not simple for those who do not understand..
i believe everyone has different minds, different thinking, different body conditions..
please do not show that you understand when u you truly don't.
coz im confused myself.
i need my own revelation... sighhhh
crisis moment. is this?
a time when u think that life is nothing but a process of death..
when all the things you go through now, all the unhappiness, all the laughter, all the tears..
all the sleepless nights.. all the As and "Papers"... all boils down to nothing in the end.. does it?
sorry, but you're reading a cynic's blog. so parden my pessimism here... prolly end after my As... which is dumb ranting now, coz i know that after As... these entries will only be seen as nothing...
really.... when u pass the certain stages in life.. crucial it may seem at that point of time... but in the end, it dosent really matter...
im just tired.. and blabbering nonsense.. again.....
ok... my bed's calling out to me... tata~
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
depressing
i'm just stupid and slow.
ok, maybe not the stupid part
but definitely slow.
it seems only the shans understand how i feel
coz at least we are of the same standards....
and its really exhausting to keep trying,
trying real hard to catch up,
to understand,
to not fall asleep so often.
but apparently the grades still don;t show..
it feels like its just stupidity on my side.
that i stumbled into the wrong world.
fell off the parallels into this odd world that i don't belong
is this just tentative? i hope.
that i can return to my real world soon,
or perhaps, be aided to live through this place,
another place that i do not know of.
ok, maybe not the stupid part
but definitely slow.
it seems only the shans understand how i feel
coz at least we are of the same standards....
and its really exhausting to keep trying,
trying real hard to catch up,
to understand,
to not fall asleep so often.
but apparently the grades still don;t show..
it feels like its just stupidity on my side.
that i stumbled into the wrong world.
fell off the parallels into this odd world that i don't belong
is this just tentative? i hope.
that i can return to my real world soon,
or perhaps, be aided to live through this place,
another place that i do not know of.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
those days
really miss those days..
when we sat down and talked for hours.
even though today was just for that short hour..
i think it really means alot.
it is not how much time u have,
but how u spend that every minute
like how it tells about life
it dosent matter how long you live,
but how you live it.
whether u chose to paint it with colours in that short moment.
or keep it blank forever.
i miss those days...
we'll find time out again wunt we??
=D
went to play bball with the 2 bros just now...
feel so intimidated by that near 190 sch team player..
and another 170 (hahah!) great 3 pointer..
seriously.. the 3 point line is dammnnn far away from me...
hahaha. but okay la.. still managed to get a few 2 pointers in. >.O
=3 and i cant do anymore pull ups. not even one. which i could do before..
gahhhhh.. i should go on a diet. i've been saying this since sec 4
blame it on the birthday wish 10 years ago.
i was like paper. cant blame me for wishing to grow fat. HAHAH
now i got it, and im complaining. hahaa. i shld wish to slim down to perfect figure.
cant be wrong now. =D thts why pple say "becareful wht u wish for"
and. hahaa, i feel so much better with integration now.
even tho i cant finish the tutorial
but...... i did stay up to try..
i still want to watch my 27 dresses and PS. I Love You.. plus one more!!! KungFu Guan Lan!!!!!
hahaa, and i think alot more other movies... i cant watch feast of love!!! OMG... why!!!!???
no time for movies anyway... but the 3 movies will be must watch
=D aight, im yawning alrdy...going off soon..
+ the moment u step onto this world, beating the first beat of your heart.
we are all destined to die. +
so cherish every moment. coz every single moment, u are waiting for death..
hahaha... i feel so pessimistic, but its how i remind myself to enjoy myself... so i do not spend the waiting days in sorrows. yup! jiayou everyone!!!! =D
when we sat down and talked for hours.
even though today was just for that short hour..
i think it really means alot.
it is not how much time u have,
but how u spend that every minute
like how it tells about life
it dosent matter how long you live,
but how you live it.
whether u chose to paint it with colours in that short moment.
or keep it blank forever.
i miss those days...
we'll find time out again wunt we??
=D
went to play bball with the 2 bros just now...
feel so intimidated by that near 190 sch team player..
and another 170 (hahah!) great 3 pointer..
seriously.. the 3 point line is dammnnn far away from me...
hahaha. but okay la.. still managed to get a few 2 pointers in. >.O
=3 and i cant do anymore pull ups. not even one. which i could do before..
gahhhhh.. i should go on a diet. i've been saying this since sec 4
blame it on the birthday wish 10 years ago.
i was like paper. cant blame me for wishing to grow fat. HAHAH
now i got it, and im complaining. hahaa. i shld wish to slim down to perfect figure.
cant be wrong now. =D thts why pple say "becareful wht u wish for"
and. hahaa, i feel so much better with integration now.
even tho i cant finish the tutorial
but...... i did stay up to try..
i still want to watch my 27 dresses and PS. I Love You.. plus one more!!! KungFu Guan Lan!!!!!
hahaa, and i think alot more other movies... i cant watch feast of love!!! OMG... why!!!!???
no time for movies anyway... but the 3 movies will be must watch
=D aight, im yawning alrdy...going off soon..
+ the moment u step onto this world, beating the first beat of your heart.
we are all destined to die. +
so cherish every moment. coz every single moment, u are waiting for death..
hahaha... i feel so pessimistic, but its how i remind myself to enjoy myself... so i do not spend the waiting days in sorrows. yup! jiayou everyone!!!! =D
Thursday, February 7, 2008
This I swear.
You're there by my side
In every way
I know that you would not forsake me
I give you my life
Would not think twice
Your love is all I need believe me
I may not say it quite as much as I should
When I say I love you darling that means for good
So open up your heart and let me in
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
I'm wondering how I ever got by
Without you in my life to guide me
Where ever I go the one thing that's true
Is everything I do I do for you
I may not say it quite as much as I should
When I say I love you darling that means for good
So open up your heart and let me in
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
So whenever you get there
Just reach out for me
I'll never let you down my love
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there This I swear
i know this sounds too cheesy and phony and whatever terms pple can think of.
but cliche as it sounds... i think its really sweet and all...
and this kind of love..... is extinct.
nonetheless, i still love this song....
i get goosebumps whenever i hear it...
(not becoz of aircon or anything.. )
and yes. this will be played on my wedding.
(that is if im not left on the shelf or smth )
In every way
I know that you would not forsake me
I give you my life
Would not think twice
Your love is all I need believe me
I may not say it quite as much as I should
When I say I love you darling that means for good
So open up your heart and let me in
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
I'm wondering how I ever got by
Without you in my life to guide me
Where ever I go the one thing that's true
Is everything I do I do for you
I may not say it quite as much as I should
When I say I love you darling that means for good
So open up your heart and let me in
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
So whenever you get there
Just reach out for me
I'll never let you down my love
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there
This I swear
And I will love you 'til forever
Until death do us part we'll be together
So take my hand and hold on tight
And we'll get there This I swear
i know this sounds too cheesy and phony and whatever terms pple can think of.
but cliche as it sounds... i think its really sweet and all...
and this kind of love..... is extinct.
nonetheless, i still love this song....
i get goosebumps whenever i hear it...
(not becoz of aircon or anything.. )
and yes. this will be played on my wedding.
(that is if im not left on the shelf or smth )
cny
happy cny pple!!! =D
dun get too fat!!! hahaha
and i should really start dieting...
everyones saying i've grown fatter...
gahhhh.... yes yes.. i have.
no offense for those who feels offended...
coz my fats are hidden under the sch u...
yupp.. so. ahaa.... 148 is fat!!
yay. and i passed 2.4 screening with my period!!!
hahaha!!!! i thought i was dying on the 4th round already...
last year was 16 secs to gold ( thanks to my ipod. coz i dropped it along the way while listening )
thank god im not a guy... =D sorry to the men out there.
watched cj7 yest. with my uncle, cousins and bro.
cj7 ( the pet itself ) is damnnnn cute!!!!
oh well.. i believe every kid has their imaginary toy/friend that they wished to have.
something perfect and super natural to satisfy human greed and desires..
gonna catch 27 dresses and kungfu dunk with the cuzins as well
and ps. i love you with the singles club.
its really really a must watch.......
i will watch it even if its the only movie i can watch for the whole year.
=D the plot is that nice.
and i wonder howmany tissues i'll use up..
oh... and its amazing how i can tear in stephen chow's movie. HAHAHA
the hospital scene is really heart wrenching...
gahhhh... i've gotta go do my tutorial ... ms seah will be breathing down our necks if i dun...
gambatte!!! fighting!! jiayou!!
=DDD
dun get too fat!!! hahaha
and i should really start dieting...
everyones saying i've grown fatter...
gahhhh.... yes yes.. i have.
no offense for those who feels offended...
coz my fats are hidden under the sch u...
yupp.. so. ahaa.... 148 is fat!!
yay. and i passed 2.4 screening with my period!!!
hahaha!!!! i thought i was dying on the 4th round already...
last year was 16 secs to gold ( thanks to my ipod. coz i dropped it along the way while listening )
thank god im not a guy... =D sorry to the men out there.
watched cj7 yest. with my uncle, cousins and bro.
cj7 ( the pet itself ) is damnnnn cute!!!!
oh well.. i believe every kid has their imaginary toy/friend that they wished to have.
something perfect and super natural to satisfy human greed and desires..
gonna catch 27 dresses and kungfu dunk with the cuzins as well
and ps. i love you with the singles club.
its really really a must watch.......
i will watch it even if its the only movie i can watch for the whole year.
=D the plot is that nice.
and i wonder howmany tissues i'll use up..
oh... and its amazing how i can tear in stephen chow's movie. HAHAHA
the hospital scene is really heart wrenching...
gahhhh... i've gotta go do my tutorial ... ms seah will be breathing down our necks if i dun...
gambatte!!! fighting!! jiayou!!
=DDD
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Narcolepsy
Narcolepsy has its typical onset in adolescence and young adulthood. There is an average 15-year delay between onset and correct diagnosis which may contribute substantially to the disabling features of the disorder. Cognitive, educational, occupational, and psychosocial problems associated with the excessive daytime sleepiness of narcolepsy have been documented. For these to occur in the crucial teen years when education, development of self-image, and development of occupational choice are taking place is especially damaging. While cognitive impairment does occur, it may only be a reflection of the excessive daytime somnolence.
The prevalence of narcolepsy is about 1 per 2,000 persons[5]. It is a reason for patient visits to sleep disorder centers, and with its onset in adolescence, it is also a major cause of learning difficulty and absenteeism from school. Normal teenagers often already experience excessive daytime sleepiness because of a maturational increase in physiological sleep tendency accentuated by multiple educational and social pressures; this may be disabling with the addition of narcolepsy symptoms in susceptible teenagers. In clinical practice, the differentiation between narcolepsy and other conditions characterized by excessive somnolence may be difficult. Treatment options are currently limited. There is a paucity in the literature of controlled double-blind studies of possible effective drugs or other forms of therapy. Mechanisms of action of some of the few available therapeutic agents have been explored but detailed studies of mechanisms of action are needed before new classes of therapeutic agents can be developed.
Narcolepsy is an underdiagnosed condition in the general population. This is partly because its severity varies from obvious to barely noticeable. Some people with narcolepsy do not suffer from loss of muscle control. Others may only feel sleepy in the evenings.
The prevalence of narcolepsy is about 1 per 2,000 persons[5]. It is a reason for patient visits to sleep disorder centers, and with its onset in adolescence, it is also a major cause of learning difficulty and absenteeism from school. Normal teenagers often already experience excessive daytime sleepiness because of a maturational increase in physiological sleep tendency accentuated by multiple educational and social pressures; this may be disabling with the addition of narcolepsy symptoms in susceptible teenagers. In clinical practice, the differentiation between narcolepsy and other conditions characterized by excessive somnolence may be difficult. Treatment options are currently limited. There is a paucity in the literature of controlled double-blind studies of possible effective drugs or other forms of therapy. Mechanisms of action of some of the few available therapeutic agents have been explored but detailed studies of mechanisms of action are needed before new classes of therapeutic agents can be developed.
Narcolepsy is an underdiagnosed condition in the general population. This is partly because its severity varies from obvious to barely noticeable. Some people with narcolepsy do not suffer from loss of muscle control. Others may only feel sleepy in the evenings.
Narcolepsy
felt terrible today.
havent cried for ages..
but it broke today.
finally.
i tried to hide it, but i guess im not very good at it
was that supposed to be motivation or pressure whtsoever??
i dont see any of it.
infact, it totally affected me, in a negative way?...
but its quite true, as to what she asked.
what are you good at??
seriously. i think theres nothing.
nothing at all...
if u consider crapping, stoning and falling asleep a talent.
i'll champ the talent contest.
yes, aint kidding.
sometimes its not that i have no answer to her questions,
but its simply just my retarded brain...
it requires a few minutes to process and think of what the person just said.
i dunno why, but my brain's just plain slow. which is why i cant understand stuffs in lectures..
unless its repeated a few times.
yes, this is how slow my brain is...
so i don't "huh" or pause because i cant think of the answer or don't know how to answer..
i just need time to process the question
and.... knowing that my brain reacts super slow to a highly impatient and pressurizing teacher,..
it retards even more.. and anxiety, panic, cold sweat, adrenaline, all gushes through my whole body a thousand times.... and looking at everyone's expression, trying to tell me the answer.. giving me that "are-you-an-idiot?-this-is-so-easy" kind of expression... it freaks me out even more... with all these happening all in a few nano seconds... its too overwhelming for me to take.
i really want to burst out of the classroom... or just jump down from the econs classroom and land on the tracks, dying ugly, when im already ugly enough….
The beautiful ugly, and the ugly beautiful.
I don’t understand why…
But I fall asleep even without knowing..
But even when I close my eyes accidentally for that few seconds..
My mind is still active, still alive, still very pretty much hearing the loud blarings of the teachers….
But during that split second, I just feel a shake or a tap and see the teacher’s eyes staring into mine, filled with disgust and disappointment.
I am not the kind that will just sprawl on the table and sleep..
And im not the kind who let my eyes just shut.
I try every single time I can or need to keep it open..
To at least force it open when I realised its close…
But the teachers just won’t understand don’t they??
Not only teachers, friends have shot me that look as well
“Why are you always sleeping?!!” I see that line written all over their face.
Do I feel like I like to sleep in class?
To always miss out prolly that minutes of lessons??
Do I like the feeling of always getting pointed out for falling asleep??
I get so pissed off about this sudden lapses of times when I fall asleep…
So I did some research about this thing and I realised theres this disorder that totally fits my experience.
Narcolepsy:
- People with narcolepsy may visibly fall asleep at unpredicted moments (such motions as head bobbing are common).
- People with narcolepsy may dream even when they only fall asleep for a few seconds.
The main characteristic of narcolepsy is excessive daytime sleepiness (EDS), even after adequate night time sleep. A person with narcolepsy is likely to become drowsy or to fall asleep, often at inappropriate times and places. Daytime naps may occur without warning and may be physically irresistible. These naps can occur several times a day.
Its quite freaky to see myself fitting in to these symptoms, even though theres finally explanation to my drowsiness and unability to control my eyelids and sleep at the same time listen and write..
i will seek doctor's help soon, to certify. so that i can stop being maligned by irritating teachers and even getting irritated with myself. it was embarrasing on my way home today... i just switched off on the train and dropped my food and created a small din...
sigh.... what can i do?? how can i deal with this????
havent cried for ages..
but it broke today.
finally.
i tried to hide it, but i guess im not very good at it
was that supposed to be motivation or pressure whtsoever??
i dont see any of it.
infact, it totally affected me, in a negative way?...
but its quite true, as to what she asked.
what are you good at??
seriously. i think theres nothing.
nothing at all...
if u consider crapping, stoning and falling asleep a talent.
i'll champ the talent contest.
yes, aint kidding.
sometimes its not that i have no answer to her questions,
but its simply just my retarded brain...
it requires a few minutes to process and think of what the person just said.
i dunno why, but my brain's just plain slow. which is why i cant understand stuffs in lectures..
unless its repeated a few times.
yes, this is how slow my brain is...
so i don't "huh" or pause because i cant think of the answer or don't know how to answer..
i just need time to process the question
and.... knowing that my brain reacts super slow to a highly impatient and pressurizing teacher,..
it retards even more.. and anxiety, panic, cold sweat, adrenaline, all gushes through my whole body a thousand times.... and looking at everyone's expression, trying to tell me the answer.. giving me that "are-you-an-idiot?-this-is-so-easy" kind of expression... it freaks me out even more... with all these happening all in a few nano seconds... its too overwhelming for me to take.
i really want to burst out of the classroom... or just jump down from the econs classroom and land on the tracks, dying ugly, when im already ugly enough….
The beautiful ugly, and the ugly beautiful.
I don’t understand why…
But I fall asleep even without knowing..
But even when I close my eyes accidentally for that few seconds..
My mind is still active, still alive, still very pretty much hearing the loud blarings of the teachers….
But during that split second, I just feel a shake or a tap and see the teacher’s eyes staring into mine, filled with disgust and disappointment.
I am not the kind that will just sprawl on the table and sleep..
And im not the kind who let my eyes just shut.
I try every single time I can or need to keep it open..
To at least force it open when I realised its close…
But the teachers just won’t understand don’t they??
Not only teachers, friends have shot me that look as well
“Why are you always sleeping?!!” I see that line written all over their face.
Do I feel like I like to sleep in class?
To always miss out prolly that minutes of lessons??
Do I like the feeling of always getting pointed out for falling asleep??
I get so pissed off about this sudden lapses of times when I fall asleep…
So I did some research about this thing and I realised theres this disorder that totally fits my experience.
Narcolepsy:
- People with narcolepsy may visibly fall asleep at unpredicted moments (such motions as head bobbing are common).
- People with narcolepsy may dream even when they only fall asleep for a few seconds.
The main characteristic of narcolepsy is excessive daytime sleepiness (EDS), even after adequate night time sleep. A person with narcolepsy is likely to become drowsy or to fall asleep, often at inappropriate times and places. Daytime naps may occur without warning and may be physically irresistible. These naps can occur several times a day.
Its quite freaky to see myself fitting in to these symptoms, even though theres finally explanation to my drowsiness and unability to control my eyelids and sleep at the same time listen and write..
i will seek doctor's help soon, to certify. so that i can stop being maligned by irritating teachers and even getting irritated with myself. it was embarrasing on my way home today... i just switched off on the train and dropped my food and created a small din...
sigh.... what can i do?? how can i deal with this????
Monday, January 28, 2008
shoo me off, hahaha
okay. i really shouldnt be here.. still on my lit essay. only have 1.25 paragraphs done... goshh...
nights make me emo. sigh.....
11:11, been seeing this recently. hahaha.
its a good sign?! =D
my bro bought PS. I LOVE YOU
seriously. that book is the best ive ever read..
made me cry and laugh...
bring me on a ride on the emotion rollercoaster.
yupp. for those who haven read it,
pls watch the movie first...
lest u';ll be disappointed coz the book is really damn good..
HAHAH.
V day's coming.... this year's gotta be a damn sad one...
single club day.. ><
and worse still... he chose that day to do that.. hahaha. ok. no one knws wht im talking about.
(u're not supposed to )
anyway.. dun matter to me anymore..
yes girl. MOVE ON... MOVE UR DAMN FAT BUM...
haahaa...
never have hope, so u'll never have disappointments.
new year solution. just get a place in uni and get my degree so i can get my stable job and work towards the passions..
its time i do something for myself aint it??! =D
ohh ohh... and im damn excited for england trip!!! hahahaha
and the thing is.. EVRYONES GOING!!! (ok la, near everyone. hee )
yay yay yay
gives me another reason to work hard.
JIAYOU!!!!!!
and tuition was highly productive today=D
my math WILL improve.
haha. elaine!! table for 8!!!
lets pray hard we dun need it...
nights make me emo. sigh.....
11:11, been seeing this recently. hahaha.
its a good sign?! =D
my bro bought PS. I LOVE YOU
seriously. that book is the best ive ever read..
made me cry and laugh...
bring me on a ride on the emotion rollercoaster.
yupp. for those who haven read it,
pls watch the movie first...
lest u';ll be disappointed coz the book is really damn good..
HAHAH.
V day's coming.... this year's gotta be a damn sad one...
single club day.. ><
and worse still... he chose that day to do that.. hahaha. ok. no one knws wht im talking about.
(u're not supposed to )
anyway.. dun matter to me anymore..
yes girl. MOVE ON... MOVE UR DAMN FAT BUM...
haahaa...
never have hope, so u'll never have disappointments.
new year solution. just get a place in uni and get my degree so i can get my stable job and work towards the passions..
its time i do something for myself aint it??! =D
ohh ohh... and im damn excited for england trip!!! hahahaha
and the thing is.. EVRYONES GOING!!! (ok la, near everyone. hee )
yay yay yay
gives me another reason to work hard.
JIAYOU!!!!!!
and tuition was highly productive today=D
my math WILL improve.
haha. elaine!! table for 8!!!
lets pray hard we dun need it...
Friday, January 18, 2008
the call
i know he won't be reading this..
so yeah, just gonna blog about it for the first and last time.
i dunno if i loved you, but i definitely know at least i liked you.
love is too much a strong word..
from the call i made just now.
i know, i won't ever think about it again...
now that your happiness is near...
i won't be there to hear.
you laughter that seemed so close
will never be there to hold.
so now i say goodbye,
to this silly infatuation.
and all the hopes.
so that all u see in my eyes.
are the remains of disguise.
so yeah, just gonna blog about it for the first and last time.
i dunno if i loved you, but i definitely know at least i liked you.
love is too much a strong word..
from the call i made just now.
i know, i won't ever think about it again...
now that your happiness is near...
i won't be there to hear.
you laughter that seemed so close
will never be there to hold.
so now i say goodbye,
to this silly infatuation.
and all the hopes.
so that all u see in my eyes.
are the remains of disguise.
不想让你知道
忽然不想让你知道
在我心中你多重要
既然你要自由
你就得到
让你永远都记得我好
忽然不想让你知道
你的爱我已经戒不掉
就让思念淹没
我不想逃
反正你将永远不知道
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道
直到有天你我年老
回忆随着白发风中闪耀
至少我清清楚楚知道
你若想起我会微笑
在我心中你多重要
既然你要自由
你就得到
让你永远都记得我好
忽然不想让你知道
你的爱我已经戒不掉
就让思念淹没
我不想逃
反正你将永远不知道
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道
直到有天你我年老
回忆随着白发风中闪耀
至少我清清楚楚知道
你若想起我会微笑
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
dead
sorry for my really bad swings today....
but if im serious..... im really serious....
and.... im never apologizing to you ever again.
NEVER WILL I IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE.
very dead today.
really drained out.
mentally..
and physically... thanks to my DAMN HEAVY BAG...
had no money for transportation today...
so had to walk to the mrt station..
it was about 9pm i guess....
pitch dark (also prolly due to my night blindness)
and there was not much people around..
kinda freaky...
haha, not very surprised im freaked out huh....
yeahh... the sounds were rather scary.... the crickets sounds....
and many other weird noises... HAHA.. paranoial u may say..
but im damn good at hallucinating...
.........i was dropping dead on my way home..
its a wonder how i manage to type so much,...
was doing the identity project...
not as easy as it seemed to be....
but thank god one great thing happened today!!
i found my files and books!!!! =DDD
omg... and mr quek/kwek/???? was in the GO as well...
his reaction was kinda interesting...
coz prolly i was really too elated... HAHA
YAY!! thankew kind soul! whoever helped me in it...
sigh... so much work recently.....
and.... thinking of tmr's audition sends the butterflies in my tummy fluttering.
rahhhhhhhh... ok... hahaa... and....
damn myself for using the forbidden word so many times....ahhhhhhhhhh
gotta go!!! my teddy's calling out to me. hah
CIAO!~
but if im serious..... im really serious....
and.... im never apologizing to you ever again.
NEVER WILL I IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE.
very dead today.
really drained out.
mentally..
and physically... thanks to my DAMN HEAVY BAG...
had no money for transportation today...
so had to walk to the mrt station..
it was about 9pm i guess....
pitch dark (also prolly due to my night blindness)
and there was not much people around..
kinda freaky...
haha, not very surprised im freaked out huh....
yeahh... the sounds were rather scary.... the crickets sounds....
and many other weird noises... HAHA.. paranoial u may say..
but im damn good at hallucinating...
.........i was dropping dead on my way home..
its a wonder how i manage to type so much,...
was doing the identity project...
not as easy as it seemed to be....
but thank god one great thing happened today!!
i found my files and books!!!! =DDD
omg... and mr quek/kwek/???? was in the GO as well...
his reaction was kinda interesting...
coz prolly i was really too elated... HAHA
YAY!! thankew kind soul! whoever helped me in it...
sigh... so much work recently.....
and.... thinking of tmr's audition sends the butterflies in my tummy fluttering.
rahhhhhhhh... ok... hahaa... and....
damn myself for using the forbidden word so many times....ahhhhhhhhhh
gotta go!!! my teddy's calling out to me. hah
CIAO!~
Thursday, January 10, 2008
living dead.
we cant deny that life is the process of dying.
its a bitter sweet process.....with an unescapable ending.
a tragic, yet relieved ending.
this process, called life, has a deadline.
some have a longer one, some shorter.
its all not up to us to control or change.
however cliche it may be, but its the truth.
the result is not important, the most vital is that we enjoy the process and learn something from it.
so, we should be enjoying life, aint that right??
but every morning, on my way to school...
i see the cruelty of survival, the expression that most people carry.
the lethargy of this process...
with work and studies...
and the aunties and grandmas who worry about the dinner for the day..
the frowns. so often displayed, but so often forgotten how ugly it is.
every morning, i try to squeeze in to the small footspace in the lrt..
everyone pushing and squeezing with irritation.
everyone checking their watches to calculate time.
im no different, constantly peeking at the time on my phone display.
calculating the time i have, contemplating if i want to or need to run for school..
isn't this what everyone do, calculating and making full use of every minute they can.
and despite not liking this, it has unfortunately became a habit of everyone.
to rush. whether u're late or not. u just rush.
before even the passenger doors at the station open,
u can feel the pressure of the people behind u,
all ready to burst out of that door to move on.
is this how life should be? a rush?? are we rushing to reach our final destination???
the routine repeats itself, day by day.. until the day when u know u fast-forwarded or rush time too hard... u cant rewind.
no chance of it... and amongst the rush. how much of it have u enjoyed. or how much do you know about the roads u pass every single day... how much do you know other than rushing to your destination.... the process again, has been neglected....
we can say that everyone is working hard to survive. but sometimes ask yourself, issit simply survival? or are we just trying to fit in, to this society.. and what if, we do not have studies,... or what if we do not have a degree.. will this really affect our survival?? so why do we put sooo much of our time in it??? what can u answer when people ask what have you done in your life.... issit just how much knowlege we have or how high our position is in some company? or how much wealth you own??? and how much have u enjoyed throughout this process... and how much have u done for yourself.....
so what do you want to include in this short yet long process before u finally reach ur destination??? issit just another morning rush??? think about it....
its a bitter sweet process.....with an unescapable ending.
a tragic, yet relieved ending.
this process, called life, has a deadline.
some have a longer one, some shorter.
its all not up to us to control or change.
however cliche it may be, but its the truth.
the result is not important, the most vital is that we enjoy the process and learn something from it.
so, we should be enjoying life, aint that right??
but every morning, on my way to school...
i see the cruelty of survival, the expression that most people carry.
the lethargy of this process...
with work and studies...
and the aunties and grandmas who worry about the dinner for the day..
the frowns. so often displayed, but so often forgotten how ugly it is.
every morning, i try to squeeze in to the small footspace in the lrt..
everyone pushing and squeezing with irritation.
everyone checking their watches to calculate time.
im no different, constantly peeking at the time on my phone display.
calculating the time i have, contemplating if i want to or need to run for school..
isn't this what everyone do, calculating and making full use of every minute they can.
and despite not liking this, it has unfortunately became a habit of everyone.
to rush. whether u're late or not. u just rush.
before even the passenger doors at the station open,
u can feel the pressure of the people behind u,
all ready to burst out of that door to move on.
is this how life should be? a rush?? are we rushing to reach our final destination???
the routine repeats itself, day by day.. until the day when u know u fast-forwarded or rush time too hard... u cant rewind.
no chance of it... and amongst the rush. how much of it have u enjoyed. or how much do you know about the roads u pass every single day... how much do you know other than rushing to your destination.... the process again, has been neglected....
we can say that everyone is working hard to survive. but sometimes ask yourself, issit simply survival? or are we just trying to fit in, to this society.. and what if, we do not have studies,... or what if we do not have a degree.. will this really affect our survival?? so why do we put sooo much of our time in it??? what can u answer when people ask what have you done in your life.... issit just how much knowlege we have or how high our position is in some company? or how much wealth you own??? and how much have u enjoyed throughout this process... and how much have u done for yourself.....
so what do you want to include in this short yet long process before u finally reach ur destination??? issit just another morning rush??? think about it....
medical leave
sick. on leave.
and... HAPPY BIRTHDAY YS!!! <3
sighss... of all days, saturday... when theres choir...
guess i hve to miss alot 3/4 of the celebration...
damn sad... ARGHHH
and i lost my voice!!!!! sound like a bass now... gross!!!!
work piling up to my neck....MC also cant rest... and tuition at night...
sighss.... so sorry.. just lemme rant. hah.
* theres a small tinge of hope tt i may find my file =D *
and... HAPPY BIRTHDAY YS!!! <3
sighss... of all days, saturday... when theres choir...
guess i hve to miss alot 3/4 of the celebration...
damn sad... ARGHHH
and i lost my voice!!!!! sound like a bass now... gross!!!!
work piling up to my neck....MC also cant rest... and tuition at night...
sighss.... so sorry.. just lemme rant. hah.
* theres a small tinge of hope tt i may find my file =D *
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
SO CLOSE.
You’re in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive
A life goes by
Romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know
All that I wanted to hold you
So close
So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close
How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?
We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close So close
And still so far
Monday, December 24, 2007
XMAS EVE, MAGICAL NIGHT
exciting gift exchange! love my prezzie siong!!! 
the huge xmas tree at vivo
in white dog cafe.. nice ambience there 
my food!!!
aint no moutain high enuf! hahah. add together the 2 SHANS!
the 4 of us @ vivo's roof park
frenz forever!! gave these to my 3 dears ^^
ME n Siong!
the 2 SHANS
3/4 strangers.
im an easy going person, and i sincerely love to make friends..BUT. if i sense "danger", or i feel stressed. don't blame me, coz i seriously seldom, rarely block pple...
Saturday, December 22, 2007
unwritten.
too many thoughts sometimes,
too many things i have in mind
a silent facade, hiding whts thundering inside of me.
so i guess, its best to leave many things unsaid..
and untouched.
may it be forgotten.
too many things i have in mind
a silent facade, hiding whts thundering inside of me.
so i guess, its best to leave many things unsaid..
and untouched.
may it be forgotten.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
untitled
the white portrait
scarred by that fine line,
the fine line that could not erased.
later the artist came.
he painted colours, he filled the whites
but deep down he knew,
that all these, were merely a facade,
a disguise, such that no one could tell
what was within, what was hidden.
this beautiful disaster, a secret,
shared only by the artist, and perhaps,
the person that gave the paper its first touch.
the paper became a vibrant one,
surfacing as a colourful portrait,
the differents paints used by many artists.
each came and painted their way on the landscape.
each came and left.
the picture became history
people grew sick of it,
colours fading,
there it stood on its stand,
forgotten and lost.
lost in reality,
lost in its own world,
lost in memory.
as the paints wear off,
the fine line, surfacing again.
they say, scars heal over time.
do they? it may be forgotten, temporarly.
but it creeps back to you now and then..
whenever dark comes, or whenever u're alone in a little room.
having the fear its going to be locked on you..
having the fear that you will be forgotten...
that no one cares if you're locked behind that door...
having the fear that your pain brings happiness to others.
that no one cares if you're crying out loud...
scarred by that fine line,
the fine line that could not erased.
later the artist came.
he painted colours, he filled the whites
but deep down he knew,
that all these, were merely a facade,
a disguise, such that no one could tell
what was within, what was hidden.
this beautiful disaster, a secret,
shared only by the artist, and perhaps,
the person that gave the paper its first touch.
the paper became a vibrant one,
surfacing as a colourful portrait,
the differents paints used by many artists.
each came and painted their way on the landscape.
each came and left.
the picture became history
people grew sick of it,
colours fading,
there it stood on its stand,
forgotten and lost.
lost in reality,
lost in its own world,
lost in memory.
as the paints wear off,
the fine line, surfacing again.
they say, scars heal over time.
do they? it may be forgotten, temporarly.
but it creeps back to you now and then..
whenever dark comes, or whenever u're alone in a little room.
having the fear its going to be locked on you..
having the fear that you will be forgotten...
that no one cares if you're locked behind that door...
having the fear that your pain brings happiness to others.
that no one cares if you're crying out loud...
腳步偶爾還是會沉重。。
时间，飞速而过。。真得太快了。
转眼间，我这个窝已经快待了七年。
墙上的漆，被粉刷过，一次又一次。
而记忆，也一次又一次的被更新，被粉刷。。
但最底层的那部分，也从来没消失过。
而只是被那一层层的保护色掩盖着。
没错，我是比从前快乐，好多好多。
谢谢了。我的朋友们，带给我那么好的回忆。
真的，小女子在这向所有真心对待我的每一位致谢。
一转眼，2008 就要来了。。
新学期也会带着它一切的压力与负荷，
压抑着每位学生。。。
这种压力。。必须自己去体会，才会知道。
真的不容易。。。
在我说这得当下，可能会被十年后的我，当成儿戏。。
因为，十年后的我，会有不能预知的烦恼和问题。。。
也许，现在的经历对以后的我，比起来，只是皮毛。。
但这一切的切。。。 还算远。。。十年，很远。。
这条漫长的路，虽然艰辛，虽然坎坷，但我也看到人的阴暗面。。
我也学会相信，学会依赖。。甚至， 有时还会忘记从前的孤胆，使怎么熬过来的。。
我太依赖了吗？
我的感情观念也变了许多。。
算是满多的。。 但我清楚之道的是。。
自己不能相信，不能依赖，不能衬托。。。
我想，这算是逃避，也算是让自己，不要上的那么深。。。
爱怎会输给了时间。
我的耳边，在听不见。。
我以为永远不会变
最习惯的明天见。。。
心会受伤，也能复原。。
秀盈。记得，不要太轻易相信。。。
转眼间，我这个窝已经快待了七年。
墙上的漆，被粉刷过，一次又一次。
而记忆，也一次又一次的被更新，被粉刷。。
但最底层的那部分，也从来没消失过。
而只是被那一层层的保护色掩盖着。
没错，我是比从前快乐，好多好多。
谢谢了。我的朋友们，带给我那么好的回忆。
真的，小女子在这向所有真心对待我的每一位致谢。
一转眼，2008 就要来了。。
新学期也会带着它一切的压力与负荷，
压抑着每位学生。。。
这种压力。。必须自己去体会，才会知道。
真的不容易。。。
在我说这得当下，可能会被十年后的我，当成儿戏。。
因为，十年后的我，会有不能预知的烦恼和问题。。。
也许，现在的经历对以后的我，比起来，只是皮毛。。
但这一切的切。。。 还算远。。。十年，很远。。
这条漫长的路，虽然艰辛，虽然坎坷，但我也看到人的阴暗面。。
我也学会相信，学会依赖。。甚至， 有时还会忘记从前的孤胆，使怎么熬过来的。。
我太依赖了吗？
我的感情观念也变了许多。。
算是满多的。。 但我清楚之道的是。。
自己不能相信，不能依赖，不能衬托。。。
我想，这算是逃避，也算是让自己，不要上的那么深。。。
爱怎会输给了时间。
我的耳边，在听不见。。
我以为永远不会变
最习惯的明天见。。。
心会受伤，也能复原。。
秀盈。记得，不要太轻易相信。。。
ESCAPE
it was a day of fun and excitement at the escape theme park yesterday. went out with jac, faith, stella, meixuan and qing. it was their 7th annivasary thus the tickets were only sold at 7 bucks! huge deals huh. anyway, tried the wild and wet thingy for my first time... was worrying and feared for nth, coz afterall it was fun. mx was screaming even more than me la. haahah. yup, everything was fun. and we took the revolving space thingy for like 5 times till it close... it was really heaven up there. it was like an addiction for me and jac... and one thing about escape was the height limit... .omgosh.... those pple were just carrying the pole around measuring my height can.... gahhh... but i think the height limit for the go kart thing shld be higher... coz apparently.. i had some difficulty stepping on the accelerator and the brakes... and.. omgosh, it was the worse thing tt happened throughout the hols.. i was coming down at high speed from the slope.. and i lost control of the steering wheel and crashed right into the curb.... caused a rather major jam there... the impact was sooo huge.. i cant even turn my neck... and my chest is in some major pain right now.... no idea wht to do... doctor or not...? coz my mum told me this before i left: " don't play until here pain there pain come back complain to me.".. yupp.. so i cant let her know... and... gahhhh.... worried! hahha. paranoid?! i dunno, but it hurts la... call me "gu niang" ba... (well, im a gal! ) ...... ok.. lemme sink in my own worries.. so long!!! CIAO~
Monday, December 17, 2007
CHANGES. BLACK OR WHITE
the conductor came back yesterday, bringing back his weirdness along as well. there were huge changes made in the choir. pple went from A2 to S1, S to A.. but alto became rather sympathatic... sighhss... ..
Saturday, December 8, 2007
complicated
the world is no longer as simple, no longer as innocent. smiles are no longer smiles, laughter no longer laughter. i don't wanna belong, don't wanna be in disguise, leen's staying here, staying in this plain world with only warmth and love and laughter.... is this possible????
BLOG DIVIDED.
i know you guys are like super anti chi. hahha, so emo stuffs in chi, so tt u guys wun be affected.. =DD
emotions overload
I DON'T WANT TO FEEL HURT. DON'T WANT TO BREAK THAT EASILY. I JUST WANT TO BE LOVED.
FUN and MOREE FUN
hahha, this is gotta be a really short one, "like me". hahah. today's daddy's birthday!!! =DD just came back from getting the cake for him from breadtalk. and today is really a tiring one, aches all over, all thanks to mahjong the whole night and the killing games at sentosa from morning till evening, yesterday was really hectic. went to karen's birthday party with some of the choir pple and my other friends =D. saw his lil bro, omgawd. so damn cute la! and her niece too!!! the choir outing was not as bad as expected. kinda fun, and me being the super blur one lost in the pig game and had to do a forfeit of getting a guy's no. the monkey game and the captain's ball match was really tiring... and throughout the whole thing, my nose was attacked twice.. >< hahha, poor nose, i knw i needa nose job, but this wasnt much of an effect huh... hahhaa!! i held the monkey position for damnnn long until someone was nice enough to let me rest. lols. legs now aching like shit!!! only me and elaine stayed over for the chalet, played mahjong with the J2s, learnt loads of new stuffs. haha, dint knw mahjong required so much knowledge. =D thankew!
last of all... before i go off... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!!!
last of all... before i go off... HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!!!
Monday, December 3, 2007
COOKING FRENZY
just like wht my title suggest, been learning how to cook (properly) hahah, not just instant noodles or fried eggs. yupp! my mum's still very nervous about me cooking, afraid that her muddleheaded clumsy daughter will turn her kitchen into ashes. so far cooked 2 complete meals for myself and my parents. hahaa, not too bad worr, can consider taking up cooking for further study. who knows, someday in the future, i'll be Head Chef Chia (HCC??!! ) in some reknown hotel. hEEEEE =DDD
Friday, November 30, 2007
ELAINE HERE U GO
haha, elaine, u told me to write about you. LOL. yupp. so we (Amanda,leen<3, Faith) went to "visit" this nearly-perfect-skin girl at gap in vivo. shes working there now, so if u have time, drop by vivo to say hi to the poor soul... shes earning only like 6 per hour ( woops, i realise i'm poorer...negative earnings) had lunch at food republic during her lunch time.. shopped in the first level till 5 plus and in conclusion, i so crowning faith as the jacket woman. hahah, seriously, shes simply a jacket magnet. hahaa. not to mention i got a white jacket for myself as well. =DDD its really pretty.... its been quite a long time since we came out, yupp. so had quite a bit of fun yest. and my mum was in a good mood thanks to my DS. hahhaa. AND!!! im not a xiao nv ren!!!! pink is just a nice colour la!!... hahha =P
ALIVE!
greetings y'all!!!! aint that a miracle, my blog came alive. finally, after several naggings and rantings from my dear friends. i think if i were to kill this blog again, they're gonna make ma write "i am a lazy blogger" a thousand lines. hahhaa. anyway, this blog is going to be all about my life, my thoughts, simply just me, so feel free to tag and come often!!!!! =DDD thankew all readers!! ^^
Friday, November 23, 2007
DEAD
i hereby announce the death of this blog.
R.I.P
p.s. charges for the murderer :: sentenced to revamp this poor blog.
hahha, kinda light for me???
well, i'll try to be not so lazy.. >< (i forgot the no. of times ive said this.. man.... im the laziest person in the whole wide world, nua-er den desdemona and the willow trees )
R.I.P
p.s. charges for the murderer :: sentenced to revamp this poor blog.
hahha, kinda light for me???
well, i'll try to be not so lazy.. >< (i forgot the no. of times ive said this.. man.... im the laziest person in the whole wide world, nua-er den desdemona and the willow trees )
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
PW!!!
such a lame thing, hahhaa, PW OP first dry run just ended for our group... =DDD ok lar, not as bad as expected, but not as good, haha, brought me back to the times of the WITS team, hahhaa... (student empowerment, i rmbed this drove us crazy. the damn fishbone. ) but somehow, i prefer wits to this damned PW lar... gahhhhhXD hahha. right. anyway, sorry my dears. hahaha, wanted to blog about the wonderful sweet 17 but the blogger sorta cocked up and DIDNT save my post, so.. yeah, nonetheless, thankew pple!!!! =DDDD loveesssss... mwahahhaa.....
borui, shoosh. LOL.. lester answering his qn right now. hahhaa!!! lame shits pw.. jiayou anyway..to all who are doing pw. jiayou!! for those taking Os, jiayou all the more!!! and As pple also.. hahhaaha
<3<3<3
borui, shoosh. LOL.. lester answering his qn right now. hahhaa!!! lame shits pw.. jiayou anyway..to all who are doing pw. jiayou!! for those taking Os, jiayou all the more!!! and As pple also.. hahhaaha
<3<3<3
Thursday, October 4, 2007
terrible
i just feel terrible. sorry pple, for spreading my downess to everyone.... i knw its not wht leen shld do... but... i m seriously in a terrible state, terrible person i am.. so i shld stop being so terrible and bring more joy to the peeps.... laughs out loud.... ok. leen stop being so immature and throwing tantrums....
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