BYE BYE

say byebye to England. yup. officially. thanks to the 3 of U!!!!!!
seriously, i felt sad la.. being left behind and all
say byebye to the friends who are going. yes.. all my best buds are going.
thanks again to the 3 of U!
say byebye to the cheap condo that ive rented out for so long.. to so many pple..
its time to tear those old walls down, build another new house.
with more stable walls for the private landed property.
yes.. it will be on sale at high price, a free hold apartment,
where one stays on, forever..
yes, say byebye to the past.
i feel like saying bye bye to the current tenant,
but each time he says he wanna move out, the desire to stay holds him back again.
i guess i'll have to wait. for the conformation slip to come.
before i can really say byebye.

fragile heart.

my heart's fragile, handle with care. if not, dun touch it at all. thanks.
its just been pieced back, i dun wanna smash it against the wall again.. too much pain to take, to much for the young heart that has yet felt loved, and yet feel the thorns pierce through each time. too much of guessing, too much of wrong decisions and too much of thoughts. yes. i shld just find a corner and hide away forever... good for nothing piece of ****. well.. i have improvements... but GP still sucked like no ones business..and econs.. dun even talk about it...


okayy.. shld focus on something else... had choir just now... Ms Seah was sooooo cute la!! OMG... AHAHAHA... i will so love her if im a guy... on this issue about being a guy. LOL... i think its amusing.... hahha. (yup, we will make a damn good couple if its possible ) HAH. but of coz.. nature forbids us to be.. well.... we are BFF. ok, i realise this post is rather incoherrent. shld end right now...

*my gosh, is tt even jealousy? *

all year's fool

yawnss... im super tired.. just finished watching ten brothers. damn sad. but they died with smiling. so not that bad.... anyway... today was supposed to be half day thing..but we ended sch with lit lecture at 130... and! there was supposed to be econs lecture at the same time..
so.... there was lit and econs going on at the same time.. we went for the lit one obviously.. dint knw econs was tt timing...
ok, i shld blog about this silly prank they played on me.... and it was seemingly real....
the 3 girls... FAITH , ANGELA and THERESA (FAT : mean pple ) hid my phone... initially A n T said they flushed my phone down the toilet,.. like wow. hahah, im not a 3 year old can.. and.... later on... they said they hid it in ms poh's pigeon hole... and it really felt damn real... coz they really sound convinced that it was there... and i went up and down the corridor... looking for my phone...and it was totally not in sight!!!! i was so panicky.. and mr w. yeo was just at the door.. he must think im insane...opening and peeping into all the pigeon hole and the recycle bin... and after that... faith said tt it cld be ms poh that has taken my phone away.. coz she went to the toilet... high chance she cld have checked the PH and took it in... so faith suggested that i msg her... and she really did sound convincing!!!!! den i went to the staffroom... pacing outside.. thinking whether to press the intercom... and i decided to wait for her to come out... and when faith wanted to drag me downstairs to find panadol... guess wht?! ms poh came out!!! i just went to her.. and started laughing in frt of her.... i think she felt shocked and amused. haaha.. from her expression.... then, F n T just ran away.. and frantically signalling me back... so i just ran back ... laughing non stop still.... and she just went back confused, i think. wht a nice prank la!!! made me run up and down and doin stupid things running around.... and i had to msg ms poh to apologize... hahhaa... too late to apologize... but she was really cool about it.. damn, have her class tmr.. woops. hahaha..

oh oh!! and rewinding back to 9am. i had PE... and.. not wanting to waste the 5 stations results... i took my 2.4... tt teacher was just being mean yest. sulks. but i walked like most of it.. and i had a not very good timing... 1640. there goes my gold.. >< but well... thank god... i passed... and for the 4th consecutive year... i ran with my period..how unlucky.. but its always this kinda timing.. so yeahh... im not going into the army anyway.. hahah!

one more thing!!!! hahaha, me and my wife were just talking about our relationship.. seriously.. its amazing.. ok. sounds wrong.. friendship i meant.... yeahh, its a wonder how close i can be with a person..... =DD love you soooooooooo much!!! haaha.. yeah. and all my other wonderful wonderful bullies and friends.. LOL.. yay. love u all! =D

*you treaded into my heart, you took away nothing.. but left the gentle footprints behind... are you wiping it off?? or will time erase it away?? but at the moment, the prints blend into mine... not now, i wouldnt wanna take away the beauty... lemme just enjoy the present... im contented this way*

=D bye peeps!!

saranghae.

DBSK madness!! omg.. love xiah and mickey. mickey has tattoos... but hes sexy. so hes forgiven. hah. Xiah's still my type. =DD bring me to korea!!!
aherm, Theresa Tan and Angela Siow stop bullying me!! damn you pple. haha. im nt to be trifled with. theresa, u knw why.. HAHAHAA...
choir concert's coming up.. haven sold a single ticket yet.. sighhss...
sorry choir.. leen's not popular.. she dun sell books and stationery.. and cant sell tickets.
LOL. sorry. tt was utter crap, i knw. dun roll ur eyes.. they may never wanna come down again...
and yay!! i got 67 for history =D a friggin B! After like ages.. i broke free of the U grade curse!! hahahaa.. yay!!! but i still have 3 Us tho.. namely GP, Econs and Math.. not surprising yeh?! haha. its eileen.. failing's her forte..... totally.
and i've decided to like myself more... if not i will just continue sinking into my little pit and see darkness forever... NOOOOO.. and all i hear are muffled echoes and the silent screams that vibrates so violently in the pits of my heart. ok.. whts with me and pits?!! okie.. i'll go for RUTS next time... the grand canyon?! lol... i realised i really veer off tangent when i talk... or write.. which is why im always doing so badly for lit n gp. eileen justs drifts off to her lala land. Thou shalt not drift... im not jay chou and neither is the title of my life initial D or initial E. hahaha...

ok, i'm self proclaiming insane... right... gotta go do math... left sch early today.. finshed econs finally... and squatting down by the road side and flagging the cab aint glam at all.. o well, eileen's never glam. not her word.

finished dou niu today.. OMGAWD LA... how can someone propose with an empty box and look so suave kneeling down lidat?!! hahaha... hes not tw's hottest guy for nth... and hebe is totally HOT. hah. but Xiah still beats everyone... i still like changmin's pup!! a maltese or smthing.. just looks CUTE! ahahahaha.... i want a pup too... oh. and i still owe kenny a hamster.. i drew a super ugly purple one for him... HAHAHA... totally ugly even tho its purple. i cant draw for heavens sake!!! hahaha.

aight... gotta zhao... =D byebye!!!!
* miss you =D *
yes, you, whoever's reading this...
HAHA.. pukes*SPATS*

OH OH..last thing.... pls get my tickets.. =D i'll love you alot alot alot alot.. HAHAH!!

OH NO.

AHHHHH.... screams!!!!! this shldnt be happening to me... sighhhs.. my heart's meeting her demise again.

i wanna scream, someone bring me to the beach.
going to cp to mug tmr. muscles totally ache.
not from today's 5 stations but more of yesterday's running and jumping...
and 2.4 on monday. like wht?!?! with my muscles and my cramping abdomen.. .aoowww.. im not gonna run man... but did well for the 5 stations tho, broke many of my own records... standing broad jump and shuttle run was amazing... 186!! i can jump over the guys of 183 club and they will go unscathed. cool huh. hahaha. anyway, the fact that i jumped over my own height isnt amazing. coz everyone shld jump over my height. hahaha. shuttle run was nice too.. i will usually retard during turns but this time was so much better... 10.77.. ok la..for a non-sports cca person. its considered commendable. and i got A for sit and reach as well.. for a woodblock, its amazing too. hahaha. yay. but 2.4 will spoil it again... GAHHHH... i cant run long distance... and i realise that my periods always come when i have to run 2.4... for 4 years consecutively. wow. hahaha.. why cant they let me run at ease?!!

but i really still feel like screaming and going crazy... bring me to somewhere secluded so that doing crazy stuffs will not seem too crazy... yawns. aight. gonna do econs...
have fun pple... in whtever u are doing..
and rmb!! absomusiclutely!!! =DD

AbsoMusicLutely

Hey all, ABSOMUSICLUTELY is proud to present you NYJC choir. pls do come down and support us and we will reward you with our hearts and souls. This night is not to be missed. contact me for further details. =D

angel in disguise

I woke up this morning feeling kind of blue
and I stumbled out of bed and
dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was a rose
and a note that said 'Somebody Loves You'
Oh~ But out on the street it starts to pour
and before I get soaking wet,
A total stranger runs to give me
the jacket off his back
I turn around to thank him
But he waves me with a smile
And I can hardly believe my eyes
He puts on a halo and starts to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
I met a good friend for lunch
and we had a delicious meal
But I forgot to bring my wallet
I felt like an imbecile
But she was sweet, she gave me a treat and
Bought me a chicken sandwich
To take home for tea
Oh~ But out on the street with nothing to eat
A man and his shopping cart go
Travelling to places
Collecting social graces
I give him my sandwich
and we chatter for a while
I see a rainbow wash over his eyes
He gives me his halo and
I start to fly
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Don't try to hide away from me
I know you're by my side
Oooh~~
Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look at Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise
I woke up this morning
Feeling kind of new

TAGGED

This quiz is dedicated to XINYING (yes, you! hah)
here goes...
Q1) 7 things/people that make u smile
Ans: my family; my friends; PURPLE?! ; cute stuffs ; the blue blue sky.. ; the As i will get in A Levels?! ahaha. [ I'LL GET IT! ] hahah, ; kids/babies?! sorry, im not a paedo. but they just make me smile =D

Q2) 7 things to do to win my heart
Ans: be ultra nice, share intimate things for 30 mins and stare deeply into my eyes for 4 mins. HAHAH. taken from GP, science of love. anyway, i just turned into a bull and shitted. sorry. HAH, anyway, the most impt things is to love me alot. tts all. =D
Q3) 7 things i believe inAns: everything.

Q4)7 things i am afraid ofAns:
hmmm? faith will wanna say everything. BUT, 7 greatest frights : dark, butterfly, eerie stuffs ( knw wht im talking abt.. ) , heights? , strange things!? , dogs or shld i say things tt move ard my legs... freaky aint it? , and most importantly the feeling of abandonment. well, im castrophobic. pple knws why. hah. =(

Q5) 7 things i do everydayAns: well, wht shld i say?! the mundane!? well.. wake, eat, bathe, sleep, study, sing, music? HAH. yey, music's in my life. =D

Q6) 7 things i want to see right nw
Ans: a fairy godmother that tells me, i will turn u pretty, rich, healthy, intelligent and everything u wanna be! ahahaha.. next, i wanna see a calendar that notes public holiday for the rest of the year, or years. then, i wanna see.... hmmm.. my history paper!... seriously.. why wun he give it back?! keeping us in suspense. anddd... i'll wanna see beautiful beautiful things?! libra has a thing for beauty. which is why i dislike the mirror.. >.< ... i wanna see everything else in frt of me, coz i cant imagine myself not able to see anything ( i just acted like the blind in lit class today, that short moment irritated me... feels so frustrating to feel the way toeverything.. )

Q7) 7 people i want to do this quizAns: kelvin, jackson, kenny, lester, elaine, amanda, faith ( write it on a piece of paper and hand in to me. by this week, or i'll call your parents. hahah ) , who else reads my blog?! i duno!! hahaha

WARNING

here again, i announce, that i am FULLY, 100% TOTALLY, STRAIGHT!!
surprised that people actually still have doubts on it.
hahaha, prolly too close to my wifey..
BUT!! im totally into guys aight?!?!'
hahaha. and im also surprised that people actually read these blogs..
and i heard haters usually read it more than friends..wow.
i dun even visit blogs of friends that often.
okie... i dunno who hates me anyway.. haha.
Blocks was a total screw up. amazing math results. U3.. U for econs n gp as well.. sighh..
when do i stop veering off tangent when i write?!
i think i'll just do wht ms kwok suggested. write the question with big writing and put it in the pencil case. hah. alright people. take care... as well as the teachers from 0732. amusing and motivating talk pck gave. hah. we are all teachers, wow.
right... byebye! wun be here for some time, concert will just jam up our whole schedule...

OH OH!!! and YOU!! yes you, the one reading this very post. please please come for <> concert! u wun be disappointed, well, we will sing our best, so bring your ears!!
pls contact me for tickets. yes.. my hotline and my email's there.. just drop me a msg or smth. THANKS PPLE! <3
nights. (:

sick....

sighh... i thought my post exam sickness curse has gone away.
but it never fails to pounce on me again.
sighhhh.... tmr ktv-ing.. how how how?!!??!
damn sian when ur whole nasal passage is clogged up. and feeling hot in the face, breathing hot air...and cold the rest of the body....
aight... shld post my journey today for orienteering on another day..
bye guys!!!
and dun fall sick.... =D

slackerz

hey peeps!! =D today aint so bad after all..
cancelled the optician thing and went home to sleep.. after all its like damn rush...
sighh,.... canceled my date with my mum. hahaha.
anyway.. sorta looking forward to the sports carnival thing.
and PILLOWMAN. =D and my mumma's birthday.
another round of singing..
omg.. im really hooked on singing now.. hahhaa
i hear music in me! lol... music is my food.
poor neighbours...i will prolly receive a warning letter soon.
or they will put me in IMH or smth... quite near my place somemore. hAH!
had a rotter's life today, but had tuition so not soo bad...
omg... Jin Zi Cong really damn nice la!! hahahaa...
i want a guy like him too! hahaha.
O well, if u describe men and women as magnets... men will prolly be the north.. and out of all the south females.. im the only north one...
repelling those guys away...
HAHA. ok, i really have weird metaphors running in my head..

aight! gotta go sleep!!
tata pple!!
LOVES..
MWAHH

happiness, short lived.

papers ended today. yay.
but my phone passes on bad news to me.
choir tmr. sectionals.
right after blocks.
wow.
ok, i knw the concert's coming up and we shldnt complain.
but argghhh... plans for the whole day have been made. morning till night.
all planned.. and i still have to go out with my mamma tmr after the optician.
and wht? tuition!? wth.
watching Hooping Dulcinea, aka 鬥牛要不要
well, i shldnt be so grouchy..
but choir's really becoming a chore..
and i lost my voice from today's singing...
had fun with the girls today tho. =D
well, happiness are often short lived.

ok, shld look forward to choir tmr.
i'll try to.

Past Midnight ( memory)

sorry if there are mistakes. this is purely from my memory. hee

Past Midnight

i turn the light on to see if i am still there
the bulb creeps to life, resentful
at being roused to work. the dreary repertoire
which a discordant band went through a dozen times
during a neighbour's funeral, is stomping in my head.
i hum a classical tune, summon
the words of a sentimental song to expel the stubborn band.
the blaring trumpets cut them down in a single blow

life is perpetual unrest in
the house estates. the endless knockings,
the endless stampeding feet, the endless hurricanes of bad temper.
the eternal television, the thrashing of bodies.
and the endless rituals of life and death.
where is the point of stillness
mature art directs us to?
my mind veers crazily,
i turn of the light,
the bulb goes on burning inside.

yup, all from my memory. not bad a go. HAHA. love this poem.
beautiful solitude. =D
aight. getting back to JJ. not the SPOP guy duhh... the LPOP guy. haha!

Last day of mugging for some time. at least.

Was studying at the library today again, with lester.
piles of books at our table, printed copies as well.
literature becomes a drag when you have examinations.
when theres a time limit and an exam scope.
damn the examinations.
damn the system.
damn!

I was just sitting at the same spot today and saw this quite cute guy. perhaps a tall version of ***
(hahaha. sorry bout the *** ) Oh well, he felt like a nice guy. HAH.
i was stoning and just looked at him while stoning, and i think he sorta realised that im "looking" at him. Right, amusing things happens between strangers. hahah
ok, i've got no idea why i'm still here. And since this is merely a textbox, i don't think it can, in any way, shoo me off this page.. argh, tmr's paper will be total thrash.
In the very first place, we have got no idea what kind of questions will be out to kill us, and we have not in much ways practiced for these 2 books, let alone an identity paper. what the hell is that? My England trip is so not my dream come true. its a say-bye-bye-to-me thing now. RAHHHHHHH. london bridge is falling down falling down falling down.....
ok, that was random, but thats me, welcome to my life. yerh. HAH
watched jeff duhman. omg, he totally rock my world!!
his humour and everything... the thing is... hes talking to himself!! which amuses me alot.. LOL..
i will post some vids of him up here soon. and trust me, ur sides will ache too.
aight. gotta go. yawns.
hate this.
BYE!

the story starts today...

The smell of cinnamon feeds the hungry nostrils.
The self, curious and inquisitive, yearning to learn everything there is..
The bubbling curosity peeks in more,
as she remain in wait for the one, day by day, the youthful lass search in vain,
for that right moment, for that right feelings, for that right man.
For the love, that she has yet to comprehend.
it remains a mystery, an ambiguous word in her dictionary.
the definition not yet discovered and felt.
she creates her make-believe-world.
trying to find the happiness in her own famous-happy-ends.
the girl turns hungry for it,
when she sees her friends. one by one, all well fed.
may not be the right kind of food.
sometimes it tastes nice, sometimes it tastes bad,
giving you occasional tummyaches.
the girl cringed and winced as she feels her tummy growled,
and the heart, just being pieced back into one, chorusing in the growls.
its gone tired yearning, tired waiting for the right food to come..
assured with the one-in-this-world safety health label..
the label, with her name on it.

she breathe the air of caffine,
so tantalizing, so enticing, so inspiring.
the smell of art, the coffeebeans appear exotic to her.
something alluring and mysterious about it.
the poems she has on hand sets her into more thinking.
each white hair determines a new set of troubles and thoughts

The sudden rush of melancholy silences her usual humour.
even though the poems are simply just examinable syllabus,
her emotions brimmed from the literary writings on life, on the sufferings on the other side of the world.
sometimes the grass is not always greener on the other side..
she felt she took the very steps of the pilgrim and feeling the gloom loom.

she heaves a few sighs, just staring at the tourists who had just arrived.
hearing mixtures of japanese, cantonese....
The last paper's on thursday.
finally the break will come soon.
this expedition seemed never ending.
and this station, for a whole 2 years. seemed the most strenous among all
many times, she break.
the flaws and the mistakes.. keeps the tears brimming in the endless pit,
her tears never dries.
as she stumble into the myriad of thoughts about India,
a foreign voice penetrated through the string on thoughts...
she turned and sees an English couple.
they took an interest with what she was doing and strike up a conversation
they seemed to be in their late 50s, early 60s.
but despite their age, they look as fit as a fiddle.
their bond were inseparable, but when her husband left the table,
she said that it was good to have sometime alone when you have been together with someone for so long.. 33 years she said.. that you can make decisions without being obliged to compromise with the other..
its a form of freedom that couples will sacrifice..
they travel together at times, alone at times...
she watches in envy at the old blissful couple.
the lady shared loads of things.
some that even inspired her..
like doing what we want and like to do,
instead of doing what we have to.

As she munches on the McSpicy she grabs in her long fingers,
her face turns red (duh, its McSPICY for goodness sake.) she feels her entire nasal passage clogging up.
her hammocks containing some water now..
she can't take spiciness, not so much, yet.
putting down the half eaten lunch,
she left her seat.
the mirror shows how red her face was
the chilling water ran from the tap, through her fingers.
she looked up again.
she sees ME

rubiks cube

in progress...
i think im really slow with this.
hahaha. the videos seemed idiot proof..
but with me around...
ahahahaha.. the statement will fail. LOL

the tragic emptiness

its late, i know.
the later the night delves into its hearts
the deeper my hole sinks.
engulfing all the darkness..
burrowing into the endless pit.
reading shakespeare's tragedy aint such a nice thing to do.
no, it definitely won't fill up the emptiness

pls ignore the quotes below, just wanna practice. HAHAHA. we cant bring the book in. sighh.

this verse here, serves some form of irony to me.
it is supposedly, a profession of love.
a bold thing to do infront of the senates.
but yet, within the boldness..
in her words, surfaces and highlights the nature of subservience.
so afterall, the adventurous spirit is not so after all.

my noble father
I do perceived a divided duty:
To you, i am bound for life and education;
My life and education both do learn me
How to respect you. You are lord of all my duty
I am in hitherto you daughter. But here's my husband;
and so much duty as my mother showed
To you, preferring you before her father,
So much i challenge that i profess
Due to the moor my lord
(1.3.178-87)

the profession of love being one thing, and having a repetition of "duty" for 3 times accentuates her acceptance of the subservient role mandated even by the consensual, companionate marital model.

quotes of love:
desdemona to othello--

I saw Othellows visage in his mind
And to his honours and his valiant parts
Did I my soul and fortunes consecrate
(1.3.248 - 50)

on money : ( the first and the last lines )
That thou, Iago, who hast had my purse (1.1.2)
and seize upon the fortunes of the Moor (5.2.363)

the first one, being Iago using Roderigo's money.
so we can see how scheming Iago is from the start
and we can see from the second one, that despite the Moor having suicide and dead.
his fortunes are taken away.
is this a representation of another issue on race. of him being a Moor??

are you people bored??
confused?
yeah, i am too.
hahaha, sometimes its just too controversial and too many ideas jumbled up.
such that having one quote for one meaning would actually mean the other.
end up, i just contradict myself.

to think or not to think, thats my question.

shelved up

OMG..... recently im so insecured..
i may just be left on the shelf!!!!!
i don't have too many years to spare..!!
and with time flying and him still not in sight!!
gosh gosh gosh...
i don't wanna be like Li-Ann.
don't even have her own kid!
ahahha. im thinking too much
maybe i shld have just gone for those blind dates..
lol!
okay.. u guys may think im insane for thinking about this at the age of 17+++
but seriously times flies..
i may just blog 5 years later with the same thing!!!
plus my so-manly-me character.
i think i will be shelved up.
collecting dust and cobwebs
rahhhhhh
aight.. bless my friends who are absorbing happiness like spongebob.
i'll be like patrick and try to get abit from them. hahahaha
lit is making me insane..
no fear shakespeare.
have fear eileen!
LOL

The Leap Years ( again? )

not again, this time round's the movie.
lovely music, beautiful plot, amazing setting.
how breath taking singapore can look.
everything about it is simply BEAUTIFUL.
Thank you Dr. Catherine Lim, for coming with such an intriguing plot.
touching right into our hearts and souls.
thanks to the producer and the music director and everyone involved for the great show put up.
really, it gave me a huge impact.
the lines from William shakespeare, oscar wilde, and even einstein...
all mean so much.... ( they have to after all.. )
but these, are simply reminders to us.
to stop and think about life.
think about how much we've missed
how much we are trying to avoid.
and yet ending up with the same ending.
so, moral of story. face it. accept fate, even though if it comes right smack on your face. don't hide. don't run.....
haha. the whole idea is sooooooooo very beautiful...
and the songs are melting me...
finally, corrine may is heard.
such a good voice and yet so little coverage in singapore..
not many knows her..
i hope people do love her music after watching the movie..
im so getting the OST..

i wanna go up to the OCBC tower to throw airplanes too... i'll bring a whole suit case as well....
and let the wind tell you how much i missed you.
the you i've never met.
but always been somewhere in my world,
just that we are all to busy to meet.
so i let the wind blow u my desires.
my burning desire for you,
whom i have known for so long,
yet not know who you are..

omgawd... im drifting off to the metaphysical again.. hahaahha
something so intangible..
so unpractical.
so wrong in this pragmatic society.
who cares, this is MY WORLD.
MY OWN WORLD.