MY LIL' ISLAND

ok....... this holiay suck .. i dunno what i've been doing... time could have been better spent.
time should have been treasured..
rather than being spent on lamenting, pondering and arguing.
thinking generates more thoughts, more suspicion , more hatred.
if you want to, you can live happily .
or you can chose to read into words, read into nothing, and see something.
something ugly...ugliness comes only when u try too hard, trying too hard, hoping to find the flaws.
there is infinite flaws u can find , even in a crystal so clear...
urgh. i've got no idea wht im blabbering at this point of time.
so tired of all these. and this time round, i'm not saying its my fault anymore, because, from the very depths of my heart, i did not insult anyone but myself, nor did i expect these insults on MYSELF would occur to be insults to ANYONE ELSE BUT MYSELF.
this won't do, if it carries on, this over-sensitivity. now it may only cause some discordance or unhappiness with others. in the future, it will only hurt YOU, yourself. It will be a major problem if this is not overcome, seriously, it will only hurt you more. advice as your best friend, i don't wanna see you suffer, nor do i wanna rope in any other innocent people. i would say, this time round, i'm innocent as well. who wld have known wht i say about myself would hurt someone else... it all happened too fast... i hate conflicts, i seriously that word, even the sound of it, how ugly it sounds, how ugly it is , to see the letters placed together... i tried my best throughout my life, to prevent them from happening, it seems, no matter how hard i try, it wouldn't steer clear my path.. nor my attempts be seen, but only magnified each single conflict..... i never did raise my voice at friends, or if i did...sorry. but i hope i didn't and in my memory, i did not. i don't always have patience , even if it went down all the way to zero, i try not to show, cause i really really really detest conflicts. i try to accomodate, try to agree, just to prevent them , but it seems they just come knocking on my door unknowingly. for the innocent, i know it sucks, sorry, but i hope you know, i don't wish for them . even if i was hurt or unhappy by what others said or did, i didnt show it much, because i don't want any conflicts...........
i had enough of them since young, i had enough of childish fights since young . and i don't want them now.

the world's a landscape filled with landmines..
u step on it unknowingly... u hurt those around you,
those innocent souls... bury their souls for you.
because of one wrong step, without even knowing its wrong.