memory?

there was one thing that Ms kwok said that impacted me alot today..
about memory, about trying to forget a part of our lives, trying to forget the traumatic experiences some had in life...
i've been searching for her recently..
facebook. friendster, blogs.. wherever..
i don't know why i'm even bothering to find out..
to see how shes doing perhaps?? to see if she's changed??
to see if shes getting on "well".... i know we were young, and naive...
but i cant help but wish that something would happen to her..
that something small.... just for vengence perhaps???
maybe something small to show her how it feels to be in my shoes..
a little revenge i wanna take..
nt too severe, afterall we were so young...
harmless as the young may look.. but the years of my growth (psychologically? ) were taunted,
and scarred.
no matter how much i tried to forgot...
the terror still flashes back now and then.....
evrey little trigger... can just pull me back to the past,
where everything was dark and haunting....
where i had no where to escape...